Hearty Dice Friends

Is it a bird? Is it... a plane? No - it's Iggy Pop, sunbaked and wretched, stomping fierce and incandescent through the abandoned streets of our nation's capital. Can YOU stop him? No. Advice: - RPGs with good, free quickstart rules - Is hating undead racism? - Rerolls, and how to make them work in the fiction - Levelling up, and how to make it interesting Design: - Don't Go In The Basement - Logan's Nan - Fake Heart Surgeon: FLATLINE - The Unstoppable Iggy Pop - Gary Busey Gauntlet - Golf Unlimited And many more. Well? Several more. Lots of love, - G+C

"Tell me, young man, what are you prepared to sacrifice to win the Premier League? Oh yes, yes, your time, your money, your friendships. These concerns are as dust when compared to the cost of true power. What if you were willing to sacrifice... a goat? Come, take up this carpet knife, join me by the crimson block, and you'll get the Hat Trick you so sorely crave." Also featuring: - The Best Vancian Magic Spell - Skeleton Impersonations - Spotlight moments - Pog Tycoon - Calm Your Tits: An Immersive VR Experience And at least one more thing, I reckon! We love you. - G+C

What, you want a house that *isn't* in one of the Sand Worms from Dune? In THIS economy? Listen: start small, by which I mean, start large, by which I mean, get inside this sand worm and find yourself a life partner by picking through the rubble it's eaten. Okay? Pfft, *millennials.* In this week's episode: - Non-verbal gaming solutions - What kills a session fastest for you? - Getting over the inevitable realisation that none of your ideas are original And: - Tree Pilvedrivers - The Stock Market Crash of 1929, but with wrestling - Harvest Moon, but it takes place inside a giant undulating worm And many more. We adore you. - Grant and Chris

Wotcher! It's Monday, that means more of us uncomfortably close to you ears. The week's sweet nothings include: House Rules Fuckable Magic & important Owned Items We also design the absolute heck out of: Godzilla's Court Mandated Therapy Sessions Skellington Dating Monumentalists & Wrestlezoo So, good luck with all that. G&C

How is it you pronounce "yacht?" No-one knows for sure, but one thing we do know is that we're going to have them. One each. We haven't decided what they're going to look like but they're definitely going to be lovely. In this week's episode: - Naming Things, the Hardest Part of Games Design - Maintaining focus at the table without use of chains OR irons - Steven Seagal's Stealthy Seagulls - Locomotive Engine Team Redeemer Z - THORN, the theoretical game that is going to pay for those yachts And many more. We adore you. Gallivant around on our yachts; we have ping-pong, and 7-Up. - Grant and Chris

"Hey! Down here! Yes, it's me, tiny Jeremy Corbyn! I'm only two inches tall and I need YOU to help me run the country!" Also in this episode: - Making currency in roleplaying games at least slightly interesting - Shit that other players do that we hate - Performing the old "Jack Reacher'round" to Tom Cruise in an F15 - The Surprisingly Upsetting World of Dogs Making Pancakes - And several more! Much love, - Grant and Chris

We are back! Chris is no longer dying from what was no doubt the actual plague so we can record his voice without risk of audio infection. We answer questions on vocabulary and seduction, design games of Nigella and glass, and generally emit the precise words you want to hear. Enjoy, to the best of your particular ability. Grant & Chris

Look, we all know what you want, and that is some saucy Dragons. We have you covered, but it is at the end so you'll just have to wait. Until then enjoy these delightful topics: Replacement humans Goblin appliances Playtest organisation Get yourself a blast of our amazing design jingle by Nick Siepmann. (Devilfish101 on our discord)You can find more of their work at https://nsfolkmusic.bandcamp.com/ Mob Circus Up the Wizard's sleeve Dragon Dating Be good to yourselves, you've earned it. - G&C

We design a charming post-apocalyptic game about robots trying to bring humans back to the earth, but we 100% don't focus on the sex. Okay? Seriously. It's non-problematic. Also featuring: - Monsterhearts X Crufts - Fiona Apple album titles as game names - Gameshow Dungeons - OPERATION DESERT FUCK - Moth Busters - Enter the Clorgdome And several more. We love you. Come here, you. - Grant and Chris

Hi, I'm the Ghost of Tom Clancy, and I'm here to say: you absolutely must take part in a futurewar! Pop on these noisy goggles and "do a drone," then join me in the Operations Room where we can talk about all the different kinds of telescope you can attach to your gun. In this week's episode: QUESTIONS: New Oaths for Paladins, Dove Games, Rural Cyberpunk DESIGN: Lich, Please; The Manchurian Candi-date; An Extended Treatise on Through The Keyhole; Britney Spears And many more! Yrs, - The G of TC

Look. we know what room 101 ACTUALLY was. One of us has a literature degree, dontcherknow. But that's an unpleasant motif for a podcast to adopt, so instead we're "pulling a BBC" and instead getting you to list all the things you hate, such as: - Hit Points! - Alignment! - Non-standard dice! - And many more. Also we design a game called FULL CONTACT CENTRE and very nearly set a battle royale game on the enormous, lumbering bulk of a positively brobdingnagian Elton John. Much love, - G+C

They're fresh out of Nandos and ready to rock - all the way to the sun, to inject a thermonuclear device into the core which will reignite the dying star and save humankind. Which would be hard enough if they weren't all wankered on Carling and trying to show their bums off to Mission Control. Also featuring - Nicholas Lyndhurst: Timefucker, Ham Dodgers, a name for Giant Mosquitos, and an extended intro about weddings

Episode 99.5! It isn't 100 yet as we want to do something wonderful and can't think of what that thing is. If you have ideas please post them to the regular places. While we have a good hard think enjoy today's episode containing: Design tolerance of wargames and RPGs Monster girls Horror one shots New games! Goat dream daddy Hippo crits The guys in the van New phone who dis? Eleanor rigby simulator 2019 (for which we apologise) It is a corker. Come give us a big hug, Grant & Chris

We develop a romance sim for pandas, but not before also sketching out Flavourpunk 2076, a Looney Tunes prison escape simulator, Ghast of the Summer Wine and several other games. We're professionals! This is what we do! Much love, - Grant and Chris

It's ya boys Grant & Chris spitting knowledge at you like someone choking on their morning coffee. The information showering you today and making your clothes smell like a hipster coffee shop is comprised mainly of: UK monster sightseeing tour Bone Dice death spirals and verisimilitude or pain bonuses and shonen anime Phylacteries for the modern Lich Masked balls - Wherein we accidentally make another video game. Monstrous species and their place in the world. So take this napkin, wipe yourself down, and enjoy. - G&C

God, people, eh? People are just the worst. They have all the wrong kinds of dice and they roll them in the wrong places. Also in this episode: - Alignment systems, why they suck, and a lot of anti-Tory rhetoric - Ethics of PDF sharing - Dis-inviting people from a group (without faking your own death) - Hugely complicated dining tables And several more! We love you! - Grant and Chris

Welcome back to another week with HDF. We have specially formulated these sounds just for your gorgeous ears. Expect to be besieged with such titillating topics as: Privilege milk Which aspects of daily life make use of game mechanics? Modern traps BIG CASH MONEY Wino animal companions and champagne artillery Dungeons & dick pics So get a mug of tea ready, sit yourself down and soak it all up you adorable person. - Grant & Chris

It's weird; you'd think there'd be more superheroes with powers that originate from hexing their children. Also in this episode: Swearing in fantasy roleplaying games The best curses? A perfect age at which to pretend to be an elf The Holiday Killer What, in hit point terms, does it mean to have someone bite your cock off And many more! - Grant and Chris

We didn't forget the episode number again. Nope. Contained with episode NINETY-FOUR Grant and Chris wax lyrical about: Physically assaulting Frog Croakley for ideas Seeking question sources Punctuation and ancestry names Slimes and animate limbs Impostor syndrome Hugs & Kisses, G&C

Fair warning: this episode has an even lower audio quality than normal, as we're adapting to a new flat. Also: we don't answer any questions in it. HOWEVER: if you want to know what to buy your GM for Valentine's Day, because it's a scant six weeks away, then this is the podcast for you! Much love, - Grant and Chris