Nursing And Cursing

Hey mamas, what kind of birth control are you using? The pill? An IUD? Your baby's screams and your building resentment of your partner? We've tried them all! This week we chat about what's worked for us in the past and what we're relying on now. Plus someone let their kid walk around Disney with no shoes and get sick. GUESS WHO? Rhymes with Dolly.

Ok kids, you want the truth?!? Your artwork sucks, your bedtime story is annoying, if you don’t eat your dinner you won’t actually shrink until you disappear, Santa ain’t real, ditto the Tooth Fairy. Mommy’s phone has plenty of battery but you still can’t watch it, the park is open, but we ain’t going. You need to wear your coat bc I care more about what strangers think of my parenting than your personal preferences, the condom broke, ETC. ETC. See, children? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!! And neither can we, which is why we fib to our kids alll day long. Listen up as we tell the truth about all our lies. UGH!

When I have kids, I’m gonna feed them organic food, read to them every day, make sure they get plenty of creative stimulation and...slam the door in my husbands face, yell at him at the top of my lungs, go passive aggressively silent, exchange nasty texts, and terrorize the kids with our screaming matches SAID NO MOTHER EVER. And yet. Couples fight. And couples with kids have more to fight about than ever bc this shit is STRESSFUL. This week we are coming clean about fighting in front of kids. Our fuckups and our efforts to improve. But plz let the record reflect: he started it.

Guys! What Should I Do? (2nd Edition) : Surprise! The real moms of Nursing & Cursing don’t know what the eff they’re doing!

V-Day Special! Who let the Dads out?!!? WHOOP WHOOP (its a dad joke, get it?) This week we have some verrrryyy special guests: OUR HUSBANDS! Join us as we discuss what they miss about their pre-baby lives n wives and we ask them the hard hitting questions like: wtf even is wrong with you?!?!?  Listen as they come clean with their #nails and #fails. Leave a comment and let us know if we should ask for joint custody for Valentine's Day. omg KIDDING!

Extracurriculars, enrichment activities, after school. Whatever you call it, it equals more time and more money. And more signing them up and more dropping them off and more picking them back up and more more MORE. So why do we do it, why do we do music classes and gymnastics and swimming and soccer and a bunch of other extra shit? Is it mom guilt, pressure to keep up, or is it possible one of us is raising the next musical prodigy and just one more piano lesson  and his talent will be obvious?!? Plus Molly’s got another gross or fail. DUH.

Finally , our episode on nursing :  from the toe-curling first days, to the emotional clusterfuck of weaning. Did you find nursing to be a pleasure or a pain, or something harder to explain (why does that sound like a Seal song?) Join us as we hand express our nursing highs and lows. Listen up and wean in.

Hey mamas!  Take a break from trying to figure out if those sweat pants spark joy (duh! They do!) and join us as we talk about housework. How much do you do? The bare minimum or do you like a spotless space?  Do you stay on top of it, or let things get really bad before you tackle it? Anyone else help out around the house ? Ugh. Would you rather fold and put away a load of laundry every day or give a blow job every day. Why is that so hard to answer. Plus some really gross fails!!

Here’s a new podcast for you: as new parents, comedians Josie and Jonny bring their humor and genuine curiosity into each conversation to get answers to questions they’re completely clueless about. Each episode of their podcast, Josie & Jonny are Having a Baby, features creators of all types talking candidly about what it means to raise a baby into a full on adult human. Check it out in Apple Podcasts: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/josie-jonny-are-having-a-baby-with-you/id1447700274?mt=2

Happy New Year Mamas!!! We missed you. How’s the Whole 30 Keto beach body shakeology dry January Kondo thing going? SAME. This week we are answering some listeners’ parenting questions.  Unfortunately, as usual, we don’t have any answers except : you’re doing great, keep going.  2019 gonna be the year of the #nail. Say it with us. ❤️

Hey mamas! Beginning with Mary in the manger, moms have literally made the holidays. Without all the mamas cooking and cleaning and shopping and wrapping and decorating and shipping, the holidays wouldn’t be shit. This week we acknowledge how extra hard moms go during the holidays and why. And Ali’s fail is a long and terrible tail ;)

It’s mom guilt’s evil twin: anxiety. We don’t know any mom that hasn’t checked to see if they're breathing in the middle of the night, or cut the grapes into grain-size bites, or triple checked the seat belts. But what else do you worry about and why? And how do you stop? This week we touch on our mom fears: the real and the imaginary. And Ali does a cujo in the truck.

I screen, you screen, the kids all scream for ...iSCREENS. Ok this week we are talking about kids and screen time. We know it’s bad, but how bad? And is it just a fact of modern life or can we just say NO? We have special guest Sarah Dunlop, the blogger behind Soemtimes Kids are Dicks helping us figure it out. She took away her kids’ screens for a summer and, well...listen and find out!!!

This week’s topic: Mom style. What do you have in your closet that looks great with those saggy boobs and the scowl you’re wearing? We discuss what passes as fashion now that we’re moms. Is it ever ok to wear a thong bikini again? and is a long butt better or worse than a muffin top??  If you do drop off in your pajamas can you brag that your look goes from night to day? And Sarah drops a bomb. ANOTHER ONE.

Happy Thanksgiving Mamas!!! We are so so so grateful for each other and all of you! And seatbelts and Harry Potter, and water, and employed husbands, and healthy kids, and early bedtimes, and kids who who can wipe and SO MANY OF LIFE’S RICHES. Thank you for listening, may your turkey be tender and your toddler be tame. We love you. #nursingandcursing #nursingandcursingpodcast #momsofinstagram #momsofig #grittyparenting #motherhoodpluggedin #flashesofreallife #parenting #momlife #honestparenting #nailingit #failingit #nursing #breastfeeding #modernparenting #badmoms #realmoms #podcast #parentingpodcast

We are fortunate enough to be raising our kids with loving and committed partners, so how come we just want them to get out of our way and let us do things the way we wanna do them!?! This week we are talking about those times when compromise and coparenting are overrated. Come on, mom, you know your way is just better. Or maybe you’re just a psycho control freak, like us

Ahh the breeze in your hair, sand between your toes, and the sound of an off-schedule baby screaming bloody murder while his brother whines for the ipad. Welcome to your vacation with kids. This week we dial in on why vacations with kids suck: it's the kids. You can change your location/time zone/outfit but THERE IS NO VACATION FROM MOTHERHOOD. So save your air miles, put paw patrol on again, and slam that marg on your couch. Plus, Sarah drops a BOMB. #nursingandcursing #nursingandcursingpodcast #momsofinstagram #momsofig #grittyparenting #motherhoodpluggedin #flashesofreallife #parenting #momlife #honestparenting #nailingit #failingit #nursing #breastfeeding #modernparenting #badmoms #realmoms #podcast #parentingpodcast #vacation #travel #travelingwithkids

Back to work after a baby? Like having a baby is some kind of vacation

Omg you guys. This week we tried to record an episode about how hard it is to survive after 7pm. How your patience hits the skids just as the kids go from hard to impossible. I mean, by 7pm mom has been on the clock for 12-13 hours, often longer. For years. Would you want your uber driver or doctor to be on her 14th hour of a 19 hour shift!?! Let’s face it: 7pm-9pm is the child abuse window. And we’ve all been there. #nursingandcursing #nursingandcursingpodcast #momsofinstagram #momsofig #grittyparenting #motherhoodpluggedin #flashesofreallife #parenting #momlife #honestparenting #nailingit #failingit #bedtime #nighttimeparenting

Our friend Laura Perlongo is pregnant with her second baby and her first son. Yay!  This week we try and help her figure out whether she should have him circumcised or not. And even though the answer seems obvious, whether or not to cut your baby’s foreskin turns out to be as confusing and controversial as whether or not you should cut bangs.  Aka: the answer is a simple Yesnomaybewtf. Join us welcoming Laura to Nursing and Cursing!!! #nursingandcursing #nursingandcursingpodcast #momsofinstagram #momsofig #grittyparenting #motherhoodpluggedin #flashesofreallife #parenting #momlife #honestparenting #nailingit #failingit #laurapergola #letstalk #circumcision #circumcised #uncircumcised