Miserable Retail Slave

Fretting about this weird world (2:47)/ Freddy Covid the great boogeyman of our time (4:17)/ bringing back the Lil Jon (6:40)/ reckless Randy and shady pasts (8:00)/ the birth of Benny Punchline (9:30)/ Randy couldn’t be president (10:30)/ The Batman Card Kingpin (11:48)/ Tommy the canceled comedian (19:00)/ Tommy is taking real estate classes (21:00)/ The Ghost of McKinley Road (26:35)/ Big Boss Realtor (35:00)/ an awkward gas station encounter (36:30)/ Taco Bell’s Mt Dew Mysticism (39:30)/ Brettski (43:00)/ the anniversary of Elvis’ death (45:04)/ a brief history of all Tommy’s band (45:56)/ Elvis conspiracies and why Elvis (48:00)/ Korn and Nickelback have covers of The Devil Went Down to Georgia now (50:25)/ Tommy tries to be RL Stine (53:00)/ A Real CatDaddy and introducing Miserable Retail Kitty (55:00)   Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826   Check out our new comedy and movie podcast. We look at b-movies and forgotten cinematic treasures…check out Someone’s Favorite Movie! https://someonesfavo

The Comedy Show! This time we review Jerry Seinfeld's new Netflix special, 23 Hours to Kill Tommy’s perfect/ Comedian (4:30)/ Seinfeld the show (5:10)/ Seeing Seinfeld live (8:35)/ Comedians in Cars Having Coffee (12:00)/ the charming arrogance of Seinfeld (13:44)/ 23 Hours to Kill (20:00)

Hot Boy Summer/ the stairs (2:00)/ “drilling all the bits” (3:14)/ waking up on the wrong side of the bed (4:20)/ my last nerve and the great kerfuffle (5:00)/ UNBELIEVABLE - a Retail worker’s tale (6:10)/ the irony of going back to work (12:30)/ the great social media philosophies of folks you went to high school with aka Microsoft Death (13:20)/ Tommy’s affairs with Mistress Alcohol (19:35)/ Tommy was on Jake Shane’s Shane Train podcast. Poor Jake! (21:53)/ face mask humor (24:05)/ Earring language (26:00)/ people are upset because Adele is skinny (28:21)/ murder hornets (29:55)/ Tommy the runner (36:15)/ Bluff (38:00)/ Manager John speaks (39:37)/ the ideal age (42:00)/ Livestream for the Cure 4 (44:23) Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content!   Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826   Check out our new comedy and movie podcast. We look at b-movies and forgotten cinematic treasures…check out Someone’s Favorite Movie! https://someonesfavoritemovie

THE COMEDY SHOW This time we talk about Greg Giraldo's stand-up special/comedy album "Midlife Vices"   The type of comedy that we like (2:50)/ “celebrity golf” by Mike Birbiglia (4:00)/ Ghost in the d-pic (5:56)/ interview with Dennis Miller on The Anthony Cumia Show (8:00)/ Midlife Vices by Greg Giraldo (15:45)/ the Comedy Central roasts (18:30)/ the secret origin of Larry the Cable Guy (19:26)/ the delivery of comedians (21:30)/ making fun of a subject without actually making fun of something real (24:00)/ segues in comedy (26:10)/ the bit that influenced Tommy the most on this album (29:06)/ technology (32:50)/ Making fun of Michael Phelps (34:00)/ easing into more reality based humor (36:45)

High pitched/ Tommy’s secret life as a dancing thespian (0:35)/ Tommy had his voice dubbed (1:35)/ the King of the Mooners (3:17)/ the 70s were sepia toned (5:00)/ Last Dance with Michael Jordan (7:13)/ Starter Jacket Wars (9:35)/ A conversation with a kid who doesn’t know Michael Jordan (11:05)/ life is weird right now - watching Tony Hawk do a 900 (17:08)/ The art of skateboarding (19:45)/ People are weirder than ever (20:14)/ Tommy is into aerobics now (22:22)/ Tommy designed new merch (23:56)/ The mystery of small faced men (28:10)/ callous (32:50)/ the secret origin of Tommy’s tattoos (33:30)/ when did tattoos become ok? (36:20)/ Blame the tattoos on Aaron Lewis of Staind (38:50)/ the song “Outside” was a generational angst anthem (40:00)/ Fred Durst talk (41:00)/ Hustle (47:50)/ Tommy steps up to the next level (48:25)/ the doppelgänger (49:45)/ mask fashion (52:50)/ men embrace old (55:30)/ Mike Tyson bought tigers from Joe Exotic. Joe Exotic is Glass Joe from Punch Out (56:51)/ the comedy show (1:00:5

“All I Wanna Do is Make Love to You” song analysis/ how bad are things? (1:25)/ Fletching (3:26)/ the ending to the song (6:00)/ online dating in the time of corona (8:20)/ cuddle brothel (11:14)/ Indiana Jones discussion (12:56)/ the one corner of Walmart (15:00)/ ice cream “parlor” (18:13)/ black market haircuts and Tommy wants a perm (19:16)/ wearing a retail mask (22:13)/  Xena Warrior Princess gives panic attacks and mints take them away (23:13)/ Tommy doesn’t matter (28:00)/ Zoom Meetings are the worst (31:30)/ Tommy’s Zoom comedy show and taking setlists and notebooks on stage (32:23)/ love in the time of corona: missed connections (38:30)/ Ryan Reynolds, Bert Kreischer, and Van Wilder (39:30)/ Tommy’s a friendmaker and ant facts (48:00)/ Mr Soapbox (51:00)/ Livestream for the Cure 4 (51:35)   Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content!   Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826   Check out our new comedy and movie podcast. We look at b-movies and

I want to be haunted by a ghost/ “now hear me out” (1:24)/ a mail order ghost company (1:53)/ ghost dads (2:23)/ Tommy won’t use a ouija board because it works (3:50)/ Richie Rich vs Poverty Joe (5:00)/ ghost camouflage and how long do you have to be in a house until you know it’s haunted (6:45)/ how to stir up ghosts, according to Tommy (8:45)/ Randy’s tale of college Calculus (12:34)/ The Corolla (16:15)/ Coronavirus Cop (18:30)/ Tommy cries about stand up (19:30)/ living in an insulated bubble (20:00)/ A Tommy cover songs album (22:24)/ what we need now is dinosaurs (23:30)/ baby wooly mammoths (24:26)/ Ghost Mammoth (25:30)/ The Narcissist (26:50)/ poor d-bags (37:20)/ I can see my mortality in Sarah Bareilles’ face (41:16)/ missed connections are gross right now (44:00)/ Dana White and UFC is going to buy an island (45:30)/ UFC Island (48:20)/ Tommy’s spoiler outrage (49:25)/ Ask Tommy Anything (52:00)/ Shoutouts to Netflix n’ Swill, The Untrained Eye, and Pitney and Amelia’s Bitchen Boutique     Visit t

Tommy’s peanut butter eating spoon/ Paranormal overload (1:05)/ existential crisis Bigfoot and Squatch’s Lament (2:00)/ demon deer (4:30)/ big Quarantine fun (5:50)/ Ted Talks 2 Much (11:46)/ our corona rules (13:09)/ Social Distance Warrior (14:29)/ the private hell of close talkers (15:00)/ the social distance dance (16:00)/ Essential Retail Slave (18:58)/ Treat Tommy’s facts as the Onion (21:00)/ Following the rules (24:48)/ Retail madness (26:50)/ Chuck Norris Action Jeans (28:18)/ Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter, and the history of fighting games (30:08)/the word of the day for the week: big knots (32:15)/ grocery cart duels (34:14)/ do you feel lucky (36:00)/ new segment: The Pinfall. WWE, Wrestlemania, and Hulk Hogan (39:00)/ Demandments (46:34)/ drive thru strip club (53:45)/ auto brewery syndrome (57:54)/ who is the prime rib now and the Salisbury steak man (1:04:37)   Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328

Tommy wakes up afraid/ a scary story and a format change/ counting sheep (2:30)/ the grandfather clock tolls and a mind poet (3:50)/ who rings the doorbell (5:05)/ the wet Willy is a knockout punch (7:00)/ teens have video games that they need to watch someone else play (9:30)/ chili (10:50)/ look to the little things (12:00)/ the era of social distancing (16:12)/ Tommy’s Minnesota Adventures (16:45)/ Pookie and getting sad for green beer (19:25)/ being ghosted in the nicest way possible, using coronavirus as an excuse, online dating in the era of corona (20:25)/ Retail is now at the top (23:49)/ a drive by spitting (24:51)/ a mouth full of diseases and the picker (25:50)/ Retail is the worst it’s ever been (27:00)/ the great toilet paper hunt (28:00)/ “I’m gonna party till the end of the world” (28:56)/ Tommy says he’s not a braggart and then brags (33:00)/ old coworkers, canceled sports, and state spirit (34:00)/ the walking sexual harassment in human form (36:00)/ Livestream for the Cure 4 (41:00)/ social

Full Body Condom/ your hands are deadly weapons (0:34)/ Aquaman’s 60-minute rule (1:48)/ that bubble boy life and bubble boy pick-up lines (3:05)/ what about the Miserable Retail Slaves? (4:41)/ identifying those who don’t wash their hands (5:30)/ The Great Toilet Paper Raid of 2020 - fear and loathing in the TP aisle (6:14)/ the grand lost art of teepeeing (7:12)/ never talk to your parents (8:14)/ Toilet Paper Masks (8:54)/ Things are serious with coronavirus, but let’s laugh (9:22)/ the real winners (10:00)/ wash your elbows/ finding guidance through Marshawn Lynch (13:50)/ the life advice of Marshawn Lynch (16:24)/ take care of y’alls mentals (17:27)/ mooch dot com (19:24)/ Livestream for the Cure 4 with Epic Film Guys/ what does the Corona virus look like? (24:00)/ The Bachelor - listen to your heart (25:19)/ magician love (26:46)/ viral content is a good virus - 2 Girls, 1 Cup (29:19)   (Episode 249) Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The

Fake Facebook profiles/ Miserable Retail Short (2:50)/ the dots above my I (5:53)/ a lady walks into a quilt store (6:31)/ grandmas gone wild (7:45)/ the death smell of horse (8:30)/ burying a dead horse (9:25)/ a perfect time for revenge (10:02)/ pour one out for your fallen horsey (10:50)/ stink worries (11:30)/ the story of the worst cut down I’ve ever heard (11:59)/ our own personal Pig Pen (14:30)/ Livestream for the Cure 4/ what is the worst smell you’ve ever dealt with (18:25)   (Episode 248) Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826 Check out our new comedy and movie podcast. We look at b-movies and forgotten cinematic treasures…check out Someone’s Favorite Movie! https://someonesfavoritemovie.podbean.com "LIKE" us on the Facebook, would ya? Even better, come join our closed Facebook crew and enjoy the insanity. Just search “Miserable Retail Slave” on the Facebook! https://www.facebook.com/groups/8320065

Emotional support animals/ Tommy’s expiration date (1:10)/ “people food” (2:00)/ constipated with glory (4:30)/ glory cheese (5:00)/ universal humor (7:42)/ the origins of Rand-eh (10:40)/ emotional support poo (12:00)/ Tommy’s went through weiners (14:00)/ emotional support bald eagles (16:50)/ have you all recovered from the Halftime show yet (25:34)/ Shakira riding a bald eagle (26:00)/ Adam Levine’s tattoos (28:00)/ Party lines filter controls (33:50)/ Miserable Internment Camp Show (35:30)/ Scarf Life (37:25)/ Brew-ha-ha (43:20)/ Pearl Jam’s new song (49:04)/ Xanfun (53:10)/ real life PAC-Man (55:40)/ the false wave (56:12)/ Missed Connections (58:00) (Episode 247) Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826 Check out our new comedy and movie podcast. We look at b-movies and forgotten cinematic treasures…check out Someone’s Favorite Movie! https://someonesfavoritemovie.podbean.com "LIKE" us on the Facebook, w

Higher/ This podcast is abstract art (4:00)/ Return of the segment - Is it offensive or NOT? (4:51)/ Stephen King is NOT a pennyWISE man (8:10)/ Tommy becomes cancelled (18:00)/ The 5th season in Michigan - Daniel Radcliffe Season (19:10)/ Stopped by a train (24:00)/ Quality question: Would you go into battle with the tattoos on your body as weapons? (26:00)/ People watching at the Tommy comedy show (27:57)/ Give me a simple ah - wealth affects pronunciation (29:00)/  Why are people allowed to drive cars? (32:00)/ The girl from Rome, Italy (34:50)/ Yeast and hops is Tommy’s mistress (35:50)/ A rant about bangs and a friendship bracelet (37:30)/ Let’s do a jig for all the security cameras (41:00)/ The Comedy Waiter and his jokes (45:00)/ LIVESTREAM FOR THE CURE 4…MARK YOUR CALENDARS!! (51:22)/ Meeting Victor (53:00)/ Comedy veteran or journeyman? (54:30)/ California Raisins and “the Last man on earth” (55:56) (Episode 246) Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive c

Time is a valuable resource/ Seinfeld love (1:26)/ Toilet paper and time is the same thing (2:12)/ What is love? (4:46)/ Reaching nap age (8:50)/ The Trump 2020 dollar bill (10:49)/  Tommy the wordsmith and another Tommy poem, The Pledge of Allegiance (14:06)/ New online dating terms: Paperclipping (18:02)/ Using NBA Jam terms to describe your life, Tommy was on TV (20:50)/ As Seen on TV (26:55)/ Randy’s Career Fair: Russian Slap Fighting and Xarm (27:32)/ The Walking Oxymoron (29:30)/ Slap Duels, Siberian Power Show,  and Dumpling (30:15)/ Xarm (34:08)/ The Wedding Tuxedo Creep (37:08)   (Episode 245)       Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content!   Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826   Check out our new comedy and movie podcast. We look at b-movies and forgotten cinematic treasures…check out Someone’s Favorite Movie! https://someonesfavoritemovie.podbean.com     "LIKE" us on the Facebook, would ya?   Even better, come join our closed Facebook c

The Power Stance/ Leather bound journals (1:15)/ Tommy, the nostalgic reader (2:20)/ The United Steaks of America and being a dumb kid (3:30)/ American Pie Myths and what would you call your plane (5:20)/ Learning from Jeopardy (7:15)/ Totally 1998 (9:25)/ Unleashing a dad sigh (11:10)/ Instruction Manual Dads (12:19)/ All for the Love of Shinedown (13:30)/ How are your cigarette withdrawals going 18-20 year olds?(20:00)/ Tommy the substitute teacher (21:00)/ Tommy reads some of his poetry: Bill the Businessman (22:38)/ Let’s actually wear our hearts on our sleeves (23:15)/ My gal (28:30)/ Randy’s new coat and magic scarf rides (30:18)/ The Notebook Boyz (32:11)/ Steven Seagal’s band (33:30)/ A fresh new decade to procrastinate away (36:00)/ How likely are you to try new things: eating sushi and flying with new wings (37:15)/ Adam Levine (38:00)/ Robots don’t understand humor and won’t take over The Meme Factory plus Baby Yoda (42:11)/ Robot farts (43:48)/ The Great Iowa Adventure (47:25)/ Axe body spray (49:

No rules apply in a Michigan winter/ high school football in small towns (0:55)/ The Michigan Winter Left Town (2:35)/ I’m sick of people who think they can do whatever they want (5:38)/ snow blades on trucks (8:30)/ the Mouth of Michigan (12:05)/ Tommy’s a vampire and his tattoos (13:45)/ Randy’s birthday (15:15)/ “Randy’s Negative Yelp Reviews” (17:00)/ an awkward situation brings humans together (19:50)/ Rebel Flag of Poverty (22:15)/ workplace problems (23:19)/ The eyes of Zuckerberg (27:00)/ Tommy’s 2 year wedding anniversary (27:50)/ setting the bar (31:23)/ craft beer problems (32:26)/ Tommy are a turkey leg (35:27)/ women’s footwear (36:56)/ Michigan vs Michigan State (42:09)/ the substitute teacher rules of life (46:23)/ the cavity (46:54)/ comedy chick fights (49:01)/ missed connection (51:25)   (Episode 243)   Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826       Check out our new comedy and movie podcast.

Nose as a time machine/ Smells that remind you of grandma (1:00)/ Crisp Waters (3:10)/ The Ultimate Trust Fall Experience (9:40)/ Name Sayings (10:00)/ Tommy dyes his clothes (10:50)/ A real life MySpace Top 8 (13:52)/ Minors buying alcohol becomes a social media event (16:55)/ Stunted (21:20)/ A “hey mister” (22:46)/ A “Wife Guy” (23:40)/ Borat (26:21)/ Tommy and Dave Landau (28:00)/ Bikers and drama (30:02)/ Post Malone (38:41)/ Jared Leto has a cult (44:44)/ The Joker (50:23)/ Obama talks about “woke” culture (51:30)/ Shout outs to Glen Thinks Stuff podcast, The Untrained Eye, and Pod-Ful of Sunshine (56:00)/ Quicksand porn and The floor is made of lava porn (57:45)   (Episode 242)   Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826   Check out our new comedy and movie podcast. We look at b-movies and forgotten cinematic treasures…check out Someone’s Favorite Movie! (https://someonesfavoritemovie.podbean.com/)   "LI

Encountering characters in the world/ Tommy’s dumb concession stand volunteer story (0:40)/ The nexus of all the walking trash (3:20)/ personal checks are time machines (5:06)/ a one man conversation (6:24)/ Teen slang and I oop sk sk sk (11:00)/ Randy-spiced (17:24)/ The fable of the grasshopper and the Equinox (17:54)/ Judgmental Jiminy Cricket (19:44)/ A date crasher (22:26)/ two times getting stood up in one week (25:00)/ fixing Tommy’s Jersey joke (30:40)/ Tommy the road comic and Tommy with Dave Landau from The Anthony Cumia show (32:00)/ The big Iowa adventure (34:55)/ our 2nd podcast: Someone’s Favorite Movie podcast (35:54)/ what’s the scariest horror movie (38:17)/ Freddy Krueger the pop culture icon (41:09)/ Tommy’s nightmares (43:05)/ The Conjuring (48:00)/ best theater experiences, seeing American Pie (50:25) (Episode 241)   Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826 "LIKE" us on the Facebook, would

This weird, wacky world/ Tommy’s show with Kevin Farley, meeting Kevin, and talking about Chris Farley (1:15)/ All the OMG Girls ran out of White Claw and do they make pumpkin-spiced White Claw (3:40)/ The world rebooted two weeks ago and now we have White Claw (5:05)/ Kevin Farley’s best friend (7:25)/ Dan Akroyd on Joe Rogan (8:50)/ Dan Akroyd spooned with a ghost (10:21)/ what Tommy believes (12:24)/ Ego in creativity (16:27)/ Learning to throw a boomerang (17:14)/ Gretchen Witmer - fix the damn roads and Tommy’s platform (18:38)/ Two old guys in overalls (20:30)/ Tommy’s liver health (21:42)/ Job interview reform (24:14)/ Can Ric Flair copyright his woooo? (26:01)/ You can’t copyright inflection (28:00)/ The caricature debate (29:13)/ what’s the stupidest thing you’ve done (32:50)/ The church sign writer is the hardest working person in America (35:00)/ Facebook Dating (41:35)/ This New White Claw World - nothing is punk rock any more (42:00)/ Mid 90s PC (44:43)/ Slide into those Google Docs (45:36)/ The

Randy was assaulted and MRS becomes a big, dumb true crime show: My Almost Perfect Murder/ these called newspapers (3:15)/ paperboys? (4:30)/ Paperboy the NES game (5:50)/ “chew on this”(6:28)/ Tommy’s tale of smartness (8:22)/ Tommy’s vicious cycle (12:30)/ Tommy is going to dinner with Kevin Farley (14:20)/ Tommy’s stupid voice is not Randy’s (16:00)/ An argument over a blue t-shirt (17:20)/ an entitled retail encountered and bang blow (20:00)/ Tommy’s faded glory and pre YouTube fame (23:00)/ a heartwarming bachelorette party encounter (25:11)/ conversation starting mustache (26:50)/ “that went over like a lead balloon” - Training Dad (28:00)/ the origin of “blow this popsicle stand” (29:57)/ Twinder (33:20)/ Marvel Girl (35:03)/ “I’m not as fat as you want me to be” (37:50)/ Tommy thinks GOOGLE is the weirdest thing (43:54)/ Keg stands (47:00)/ Randy signs up for Facebook Dating on the show (48:50)/ Running into someone in real life who rejected you via online dating (49:52)/ how does Facebook Dating work