The Tom Barnard Show

We've got Laurel and Hardy, we've got shattered toes, we've got Jeopardy, and then like five more topics. There's a lot to talk about today.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you're a kid, we have two things to say.  First, stop listening to our show.  It's inappropriate.  Second, don't message Momo, even if your friends tell you to.  Also if you happen to know Tommy Wiseau, tell him to give us a call.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Exciting news: we have a new Keurig. Also exciting news: segregation has been abolished. The latter might not technically be news any more. Still, it's something we talk about today so it counts.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Have you ever been to Butternut, MN? Probably not, because it doesn't exist. Unless you count one of the three lakes with that name. While the town may not be real, it's real in Mary's books, and apparently she's done her research into how Minnesotans are.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We've been talking about The Nun for a while now, and Tom finally saw it. Surprise, he hated it. Then again, so did Kristyn. It's still better than fleeing gang violence at Valley Fair, but you know.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It might be time to reconsider how easy it is to turn food stamps into cash when people start buying drugs and private dancers with them. Wait, this just in: a private dancer has been flagged for putting her whole body weight against a client.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Remember land lines? Remember cable TV? Remember the original version of A Star is Born? Maybe not that last one. But we remember everything, including movies we watched recently.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

These clips are packing up the shorts and lawn chairs, and are getting ready to hibernate in the warmth of The Best Of. Clips Featuring: Spencer Dobson, London Brown, Brandon Lewis, and Steve ByrneSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Just after talking about South Dakota for an hour, we have a comedian from North Dakota in. What are the odds? According to the world almanac, 2%. I guess that's not so bad.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Did you know that Shy hasn't eaten in two years? Well, something like that. We're getting a Hy-Vee soon though, so that might change things. Interesting, I know.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A lot of people believe that Europe is a paradise of equality, but they're having the same problems as we are. Katherine may or may not have known this when she left the US. She certainly knows about it now, because she's written a book around the topic, Nowhere Boy.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

God and country have gone together for centuries, especially since "country" started also being a form of music. The latter association is thanks to people like Julie, whose singing career is a literal answered prayer. Apparently Tom and Kathryn have been praying for a new Thai restaurant because they're equally enthusiastic.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Today, coincidentally, we're talking about two related topics: drugs and big cities. Cities (mostly) suck. Drugs are certainly a reason, though far from the only one. Opiates are the best pain-killer we have, but they're also addictive. If anyone listening knows of a better option you stand to make a couple billion dollars. Just saying.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you have polycystic ovaries, you may have polycystic ovary syndrome. But you also might not. Also if you have PCOS you might not have polycystic ovaries. It's a nebulous disorder.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The Vietnam war is perhaps most famous for its ability to impart a thousand yard stare to anyone who fought in it. Or perhaps for the fact that almost nobody wanted to fight it, even those in the military. Brian explains why it happened anyway.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We're looking for a new, more humane execution method. By "we", I mean an owner of some lobster shack. Some might say they're lobsters so who cares, but some of them could have PTSD so we have to be sensitive.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The Vikings made a lot of gamblers unhappy yesterday, which makes Costaki very happy. The Vikings' performance, not the gambler thing. Though we have seen no evidence that Costaki isn't a bookie.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Tom's taking another risk by backing a political candidate, but really, how much worse can things get? Either way he's from the north side so he gets a pass.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We batton down the hatches with this episode of The Best Of. Clips featuring: Gary Busey, Mike Gelfand, and Paula BelSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In 2006, Rush Limbaugh got in trouble involving pills in an airport. In 2018, Ryan Hamilton appeared on the Tom Barnard Show. The two aren't related, but the AI that controls what we see and hear doesn't know that.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.