X-aspirations

X-Aspirations Episode 106 X-Men #124, August 1979 "He Only Laughs When I Hurt!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Tom Orzechowski, Colors by Glynis Wein, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter Dungeons and Diagrams! In Which We Find That There Is No Crisis Storm Can Not Face Through Increased Teenage Boy Titillation, That Half A Villainess Costume Might Not Be Better Than None, And That Cyclops Found His Red Cross Training Got Him More Than Just A Renewal Of His Lifeguard Certification! One Should Never Underestimate The Destructive Power Of The Letter 'Z'! Pronounced like it Rhymes With Bee not Bed, I am Looking At You England! Check out the Elana Pritchard Jailhouse Comics at http://www.laweekly.com/arts/when-a-cartoonist-landed-in-la-county-jail-she-drew-what-she-saw-using-only-a-golf-pencil-5315346 Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 105 X-Men #123, July 1979 "Listen -- Stop Me if You've Heard It -- But This One Will Kill You!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Tom Orzechowski, Colors by Glynis Wein, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter A Festival of Internecine Fights! In Which We Discover That Ororo Must Be By Far the Cleanest Member of the X-men, That Colossus Has Finally Earned His Big Boy Pants, And That Arcade Has Managed To Merge His Three Greatest Passions: Homicide, Inflatable Latex, and Who Rock Operas! If There Is One Thing We Know about Banshee It Is That He Loves Idiosyncratic Language, Particularly Mixtures of Standard English Lexical Items With Neologistic Multilingual Puns and Portmanteau Words! Well That, And Tobacco! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 104 X-Men #122, June 1979 "Cry for the Children!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Tom Orzechowski, Colors by Glynis Wein, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter Whole House Helps With Hopeful Heroes! In Which We Find That Wolverine is a Worker's Comp Lawsuit Waiting To Happen, That On the Shi'Ar Homeworld No One Can Avoid The Noid, and That Colleen Wing Is Looking For a House Call From The One-Eyed Wonder! It Is Both Not What You Are Thinking and Totally Is! I Knew A Kid Named Bluey In High School. Very Popular. Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 103 X-Men #121, May 1979 "Shoot-Out at the Stampede!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Diana Albers, Colors by Glynis Wein, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter An Instance Of Classic! In Which We Discover That Sugar and Spice and PCP-Ice, That's What Calgary Is Made Of, That Most Supervillainy Is Just A Side Effect Of Grumpy Tummies, And That If Vindicator Is Not Careful He Might Just Fly His F-14 Tomcat Right Into The Danger Zone!!! Vindicator Promised Logan It Wouldn't Get Weird! But, Yeah, It Got Weird. Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 102 X-Men #120, April 1979 "Wanted: Wolverine! Dead or Alive!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Tom Orzechowski, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter Catch A Rising Starlin! In Which We Learn That There Is No Shame Greater Than The Mid-Plane Walk of Shame, That Storm Would Be Perfect For Hair or Equus or Really Any Play Where She Can Hang Out Her Junk, And That, Yes, Banshee Did Try Adding Both Ginger and Honey To Hot Chamomile And Now Would Like You To Shut Up With All Your Home Brewed Throat Bullcrap! Our Ignorance Of Canada May Be Broad, But Our Casual Dismissiveness Is Deep! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 101 X-Men #119, March 1979 "Twas The Night Before Christmas..." Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Costanza, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter Hatfield and McCoys Got Nothing On Us! In Which We Find That One Should Fear Nightcrawler And His Arsenal Of Swirlies, Indian Burns, and Red Bellies, That Colleen Wing Is Desperately Trying To Get On The Right Email Lists, or Phone Trees, or Maybe Just Set Her RSS Fields Correctly, And That Jean Does Not Understand Why Misty Knight Insists On Telling Her How Japan Is Super Boring And No One's Boyfriends Ever Double Die There! Yikes! An Uncomfortably Large Quantity Of Porn Talk! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 100 X-Men #118, February 1979 "The Submergence of Japan" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Ric Villamonte, Lettered by Tom Orzechowski, Colors by Glynis Wein, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter Sometimes You Clip, Sometimes You Get Clipped! In Which We Learn That Colossus Has Both A Hulk Fetish And The Torn Pants To Prove It, That If Sunfire Drops Just One More "Woman" Epithet Then The Only Thing Left Capable Of Rising On His Torso Wil Be His Sun, And That Wolverine Is The Best At What He Does And What He Does Is Love Anachronistic Geishas That Are Still Out of His League! Waiting For The Other Shoe To Plop! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 099 X-Men #117, January 1979 "Psi War!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Clem Robins, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter Marvel And Its Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy! In Which We Discover That What Lilandra Really Wants To Be Empress of Is The Local Sephora, That Xavier came to Cairo for the Sex Tourism, but Stayed For The Astral Sex Tourism, That Twilight’s Bella and The Smith’s Morrisey Have Both Just Arrived To Tell Xavier To Cheer The F*%^ Up!! Power Man and Iron Fist Have Stopped Running Love-Seeking Personals. For Some Reason They Only Get The Freaks! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Special Episode Podcast X-Men: Days of Future Past Starring James McAvoy, Patrick Stewart, Ian Mckellen, and Michael Fassbender as Professor X and Magneto. And of course Hugh Jackman as Wolverine! Directed by Bryan Singer. We lie down again and take our second foray into Marvel Mutant Movies! Check out what we thought of this X-Mash-Up of epic proportions. Just as a warning, we spoil the heck out of it after that. So listen with care. Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 098 X-Men #116, December 1978 "To Save The Savage Land" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Tom Orzechowski, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter Verpooten In The Lappings of Luxury! In Which We Find That The Pterodactyl Men Would Be Wise To Invest In Some High Quality Bond Stationery, That Banshee Has a Body Built For Ladies But A Mouth Designed For Rest Stops, And That It Looks Like Cyclops Needs To Stop Skipping Xavier's Zoomba Classes! More Ken Howard Trivia: The White Shadow Was The First Ensemble Drama on Prime-Time Television With a Predominantly African-American Cast! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 097 X-Men #115, November 1978 "Visions of Death!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Rick Parker, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter Mo Maddy, She Wrote Me A Letter! In Which We Learn That The Savage Land May Destroy Your Shirt But The Delicious Mansculpting Kind Of Makes Up For It, That Cyclops Is Such A Coward That Not Even Kenny Rogers Could Redeem Him, And That I'll Be Fine With Flame Skin Drawings As Long As They Cut The Stupid Chinese Symbols Crap! You Don't Speak Flame Chinese Either, Poseur! Well, It Really Matters Exactly Which Parts Are Petrified, Doesn't It?! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 096 X-Men #114, October 1978 "Desolation!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Jean Simek, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter Do Touch This Podcast With A 39 and Half Foot Pole! In Which We Discover That One Should Never Bother A Living Embodiment Of Rebirth Until After Its First Cup Of Coffee, That Wolverine Is Basically A Walking Cable-Knit Sweater, And That Summers Can Not Decide Whether To Get The Tom Sellick Or Go For The Full Oates! On An Unrelated Note, My Wife Forbade Me To Travel To Antarctica. Thanks A Lot Banshee! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 095 X-Men #113, September 1978 "Showdown!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by A. Kawecki, Edited by Roger Stern, Editor-In-Chief Jim Shooter Every Mutt Has His Day! In Which We Discover That Scott Needs To Use His Words When He Makes Boom Boom, That If You Give Storm A Bowl Of Cherries You'll Get Back A Pile Of Bowline and Hitch Knots, And That With Four Opposable Thumbs No One Should Be Surprised That The Beast Gets So Handsy! It Is Not The Heat That Gets Magneto It Is The Lack Of Humidity! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 094 X-Men #112, August 1978 "Magneto Triumphant!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Bruce Patterson, Edited by Jim Shooter K-Ruff The Criminal Dog! In Which We Find That Magneto Is Like a Box Of Chocolates, Only Its Just Two Flavors And They Both Taste Nasty, That While Moira MacTaggert May Look Good In The French Maid Outfit That Is As Far as It Goes, And That Wolverine Has a Rational Fear of Giant Knives In His Face! There Is One Reason Most of South America Is Flyover Country: Jaguars! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 093 X-Men #111, June 1978 "Mind Games!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inks by Terry Austin, Lettered by Tom Orzechowski, Edited by Archie Goodwin Wolfman Gets A Case of Heart Byrne! In Which We Learn That Beast Has A Singin' In The Rain Wardrobe Always At The Ready, That You Have To Pay Extra For The Yukon Blow Off, And That Wolverine Is McCoy's Feral Brother of Another Mother! No Hypnotist Can Stand Before The Awesome Might Of Conjuctivitis! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 092 X-Men #110, April 1978 "The 'X'-Sanction!" Written by Chris Claremont, Art by Tony DeZuniga and Dave Cockrum, Lettered by Annette Kawecki, Colors by Andy Yanchus, Edited by Archie Goodwin Don't Make Hulk Angry… By Refusing To Buy Back His Cocaine! In Which We Discover That Wolverine Treats Every Problem Like A Gordian Knot, That The Mansion Workplace Environment Really Improved Once The Professor Instituted The No Pining For Jean Grey Rule, And That Wolverine Likes To Win His Ladies The Right Way: Popping The Biggest Claw! Being Wolverine's Secret Santa Is A Thankless Task! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 091 X-Men #109, February 1978 "Home Are The Heroes!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inked by Terry Austin, Lettered by Joe Rosen, Colors by Andy Yanchus, Edited by Archie Goodwin Don't Byrne Your Bridges! In Which We Learn That Sharing A Bedroom Wall With Banshee Must Be A Total Nightmare, That Colossus Needs To Recognize That Not Every Hairy Dude Wants To Be Compared to Chewbacca, And That When Wolverine Wears Someone's Leopardtard, He Is Sharing Costumes With Everyone THEY Shared WITH and Everyone THEY Shared WITH and So On… Olivia Newton John Is The Last Missing Summers Sibling! Her Mutant Ability? Body Talk! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 090 X-Men #108, December 1977 "Armageddon Now!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by John Byrne, Inked by Terry Austin, Lettered by Wohl and Orz, Colors by Andy Yanchus, Edited by Archie Goodwin If You Play With Fire You Will Get John Byrne! In Which We Find That Most Space Pirate Lizardmen Would Kill For A Tube Of Chapstick, That Alien Guard Dwarfs Fearlessly Wield Their Crotches Like Pubescent Girl Gymnists, And That Ben Affleck Was This Close To Going With The Story Of The X-Men and the M'Kraan Crystal, Only Alan Arkin Refused To Wear The Damn Adamantium Claws! Try Banshee's Irish Throat Blasters! Now With Twice The Menthalyptus! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 089 X-Men #107, October 1977 "Where No X-Man Has Gone Before!" Written by Chris Claremont, Pencils by Dave Cockrum, Inked by Dan Green, Lettered by Sam Rosen, Colors by Andy Yanchus, Edited by Archie Goodwin Legion's Hair Disease? In Which We Discover That No One Gets Wolverine's Constant References To Early Silver Screen Comedic Duos, That You Haven't Seen An Old Boys Club Until You Have Seen An Old Boys Club Entirely Composed of Insect Men, And That Xavier's Embodiment Of All His Psychic Energy, Potential, and Focus Is Kind Of A Man-Slut!kend Minutes, That As A Canadian Wolverine Is Unable To Resist A Fine Ice Sluice, And That Once The X-Men Meet Xavier's Alter Ego They Will Be Green With Envy! Sure, The Double Spiked Tongue Is Off-Putting At First But Believe Me, Try A Bifurcated Smack And You Will Not Go Back! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com

X-Aspirations Episode 088 X-Men #106, August 1977 "Dark Shroud of the Past!" Written by Chris Claremont and Bill Mantlo, Pencils by Dave Cockrum and Bob Brown, Inked by Tom Sutton, Lettered by Sam Rosen, Colors by Andy Yanchus, Edited by Archie Goodwin Ask Not For Whom The Marriage Bells Toll, They Toll For Charlie! In Which We Find That For Teleportation Nightcrawler Has No Choice But To Use His Night and Weekend Minutes, That As A Canadian Wolverine Is Unable To Resist A Fine Ice Sluice, And That Once The X-Men Meet Xavier's Alter Ego They Will Be Green With Envy! Cyke, Cyke, Cyke of the X-Men, Watch Out For That Tree! Check us out at www.x-aspirations.com And send us comments at xteam@x-aspirations.com