So Very Wrong About Games

Walker's got this friend with a problem--not Walker, no not at all, a friend, you see, his name is... Bike Docker... and Bike has this problem that he judges a game by its cover art. Mike I mean Bike is so blinded by his prejudice that it causes him to rag on games like El Grande or GMT's entire catalog just because the cover doesn't appeal to his sensibilities. Luckily, there are enlightened people like Mike Walker to guide those like Bike Docker. 01:33 AYURIS: Tapestry (Jamey Stegmaier, Stonemaier Games, 2019)Games Played Last Week:03:09 -Street Masters: Aftershock (Adam Sadler & Brady Sadler, Blacklist Games, 2019)04:38 -Fast & Furious: Highway Heist (Prospero Hall, Funko Games, 2021)11:46 -Imperium: The Contention (Gary Dworetsky, Contention Games, 2021)15:23 -Four Gardens (Martin Doležal, Korea Boardgames, 2020)18:12 -A Game of Thrones: The Board Game (Second Edition) (Christian T. Petersen, Fantasy Flight, 2011)19:30 -Spirit Island: Jagged Earth (R. Eric Reuss, Greater Than Games, 2

Our inaugural Mark Bigney is a Blithering Idiot Fest has arrived, and we can chronicle a minor subsection of things that make evident Mark is a not a smart man. Although this episode is jam-packed with content, even its confines cannot contain a comprehensive accounting; rest assured we will return to this topic in future instalments. Games Played Last Week:01:42 -Kemet: Blood and Sand (Jacques Bariot & Guillaume Montiage, Matagot, 2021)09:24 -Scythe (Jamey Stegmaier, Stonemaier Games, 2016)10:55 -Finished! (Friedemann Friese, 2F-Spiele, 2017)15:51 -Groundhog Day: The Game (Prospero Hall, Funko Games, 2021)22:27 -Street Masters: Aftershock (Adam Sadler & Brady Sadler, Blacklist Games, 2019)24:11 -Imperium: The Contention (Gary Dworetsky, Contention Games, 2021)29:25 -Commands & Colors: Samurai Battles (Richard Borg, GMT Games, 2021)32:59 -Asgard's Chosen (Morgan Dontanville, Mayfair Games, 2013)(Variant: https://www.boardgamegeek.com/thread/1058313/solo-variant-more-tense-gameplay)35:23 -Spiri

From Wikipedia: "Mark Sinclair (born July 18, 1967), known professionally as Vin Diesel, is an American actor and filmmaker. One of the world's highest-grossing actors, he is best known for playing Dominic Toretto in the Fast & Furious franchise.Diesel began his career in 1990 but struggled to gain roles until he wrote, directed, produced, and starred in the short film Multi-Facial (1995). This attracted the attention of Steven Spielberg, who was developing Saving Private Ryan (1998), and re-wrote elements of the film to allow Diesel to appear in a supporting role. Diesel subsequently voiced the titular character in The Iron Giant (1999) while gaining a reputation as an action star after headlining the Fast & Furious, XXX, and The Chronicles of Riddick film franchises." 01:20 AYURIS: Black Angel (Sébastien Dujardin, Xavier Georges, & Alain Orban, Pearl Games, 2019)Games Played Last Week:03:08 -Vengeance: Roll and Fight Episode 1 (Gordon Calleja, Noralie Lubbers, & Dávid Turczi, Mig

Fun fact: The Red Cathedral isn't really a cathedral at all, it's a sobor, which isn't really the same thing. Also fun fact: Unsurprisingly, Mark is wrong to say that Fenrir will swallow the moon at the end of the world, as that is patently absurd. Fenrir swallows the sun, which makes perfect sense. Except, of course, for renditions where Fenrir's children Skoll and Hati swallow the moon and sun respectively. I guess we'll have to wait and see who got it right. We value editorial rigour here at SVWAG. Games Played Last Week:01:57 -Veangeance: Roll and Fight Episode 1 (Gordon Calleja, Noralie Lubbers, & Dávid Turczi, Mighty Boards, 2021)06:30 -Blood Rage: Promos Box (Eric M. Lang, CMON, 2019)10:09 -Nidavellir: Thingvellir (Serge Laget, GRRRE Games, 2020)12:03 -Whale Riders: The Card Game (Reiner Knizia, Grail Games, 2021)13:57 -Whale Riders (Reiner Knizia, Grail Games, 2021)16:26 -Lancaster (Mathias Cramer, Queen Games, 2011)20:44 -Cubitos (John D. Clair, AEG, 2021)22:37 -Regicide (Paul

Knizia reference, check; Kant reference, check; Shakespeare reference, check (albeit subtle); Scott Pilgrim reference, check (albeit a gimme); Macross reference, check; Letterkenny reference... wait, this must be a mistake. Where's the Letterkenny reference? This is no way to try to win a Golden Geek.01:58 AYURIS: Edge of Darkness (John D. Clair, AEG, 2019) Games Played Last Week:03:38 -Scott Pilgrim Miniatures the World (Erica Bouyouris, Renegade Game Studios, 2021)07:53 -Red Rising (Alexander Schmidt & Jamey Stegmaier, Stonemaier Games, 2021)13:13 -In a Grove (Jun Sasaki, Oink Games, 2011)16:13 -Moon Adventure (Jun Sasaki, Oink Games, 2021)19:43 -Cosmic Frog (Jim Felli, Devious Weasel Games, 2020)20:55 -Galaxy Hunters (Daniel Alves, IDW Games, 2021)23:15 -Regicide (Paul Abrahams, Luke Badger, & Andy Richdale, Badgers from Mars, 2020)25:21 -L.A.M.A. Dice (Reiner Knizia, AMIGO, 2021)27:38 -Abandon All Artichokes (Emma Larkins, Gamewright, 2020)30:57 -The Magnificent (Eilif Svensson & Kristian

The trajectory of spin-offs seems indelibly tied to aquatic environments, so perhaps we ought to accept the inevitable and begin planning for "SVWAG of the Depths" wherein our hosts play games and then talk about them while entirely submerged. Imagine what effect it will have on most dexterity games! Only Chip Theory Games' offerings will emerge unaltered. Sound quality will perforce suffer, as no doubt will the hosts' lungs, but no one said art was going to be easy.Games Played Last Week:01:26 -Formula Dé (Laurent Lavaur & Eric Randall, Eurogames, 1997)01:44 -Automobiles (David Short, AEG, 2016)02:00 -Cubitos (John D. Clair, AEG, 2021)12:45 -Ra (Reiner Knizia, alea, 1999) 16:38 -Hallertau (Uwe Rosenberg, Lookout Games, 2020)20:39 -Regicide (Paul Abrahams, Luke Badger, & Andy Richdale, Badgers from Mars, 2020)25:00 -Jekyll vs. Hyde (Geonil, Mandoo Games, 2021)27:04 -The Magnificent (Eilif Svensson & Kristian Amundsen Østby, Aporta Games, 2019)30:18 -Champions of Midgard (Ole Steine

Important Macross news! Mark will ruthlessly exploit any and all chances to mention Macross, and so he shoehorns in a quote from a Macross property so he can talk about Macross. He can then mention his mention of Macross in the episode description, in a move called Meta-cross. There's some stuff about board games too, I guess.01:51 AYURIS: Warhammer Age of Sigmar: Warcry (Uncredited, Games Workshop, 2019) Games Played Last Week:04:22 -After the Empire (Evan Halbert & Ryan Mauk, Grey Fox Games, 2021)12:47 -Beyond the Sun (Dennis K. Chan, Rio Grande Games, 2020) 16:18 -Keyflower (Sebastien Bleasdale & Richard Breese, R&D Games, 2012)21:22 -Black Rose Wars: Sator Box (Marco Montanaro, Ludus Magnus Studio, 2020)27:26 -Commands & Colors: Samurai Battles (Richard Borg, GMT Games, 2021)37:47 -Haiclue (Will Leaf, Tiger Board Games, 2019)38:46 -Street Fighter: The Miniatures Game (Alex Tune & Joe Vargas, Jasco Games, 2021)News (and why it doesn't matter): 44:40 15th annual Golden Geek Award

A great man once said that he thought bullets should cost five thousand dollars. As we are not currently playing a game of SHASN, we here at SVWAG will demur on weighing in on hot-button political issues at this time. Suffice to say that while there is another raging controversy about whether one should address cost in the context of board games criticism, Bullet♥︎ does not cost five thousand dollars. Games Played Last Week:02:05 -Nidavellir: Thingvellir (Serge Laget, GRRRE Games, 2020)04:48 -Gùgōng: Pànjūn (Andreas Steding, Game Brewer, 2020)09:50 -A Billion Suns: Interstellar Fleet Battles (Mike Hutchinson, Osprey Games, 2021)15:01 -Star Trek: Alliance – Dominion War Campaign (Josh Derksen & Thomas M. Gofton, WizKids, 2021)20:12 -SHASN (Zain Memon, Memesys Culture Lab, 2021)28:11 -The Red Cathedral (Israel Cendrero & Sheila Santos, Devir Games, 2020)31:44 -Pandemic Legacy: Season 0 (Rob Daviau & Matt Leacock, Z-Man Games, 2020)[EDIT: An earlier version of this episode implied that Merv was desig

No, not winning, that is emphatically not on the docket today. Today we inveigh against whining, which is a form of meta-whining; what the Brits call "recursive whinging" or the French language names "le grand boo-hoo." Given that the hosts engage in this degenerate, despicable behaviour, this is very much an issue of do as we say, not as we say when whining. Perhaps this is more complicated than I first suspected.01:16 AYURIS: Sol: Last Days of a Star (Ryan Spangler & Sean Spangler, Elephant Laboratories, 2017)Games Played Last Week:03:55 -Root (Cole Wehrle, Leder Games, 2008)07:30 -Hard City (Adam Kwapiński & Marek Raczyński, Hexy Studio, 2020)12:09 -Tajuto (Reiner Knizia, Super Meeple, 2019)16:09 -Medici (Reiner Knizia, AMIGO, 1995)19:30 -The Search for Planet X (Matthew O'Malley & Ben Rosset, Renegade Game Studios, 2020)26:26 -Blackout: Hong Kong (Alexander Pfister, eggertspiele, 2018) 31:06 -The Shores of Tripoli (Kevin Bertram, Fort Circle Games, 2020)35:42 -Shadows: Amst

Don't you know who I amRemember my nameFaiyumI'm gonna live for everI'm gonna learn how to fly-clearly some song about ancient PharaohsGames Played Last Week:00:51 -Aquatica (Ivan Tuzovsky, Cosmodrome Games, 2019)05:06 -Dungeon Petz (Vlaada Chvátil, CGE, 2011)07:46 -Concordia Solitaria (Mac Gerdts, PD-Verlag, 2021) 11:25 -CuBirds (Stefan Alexander, Catch Up Games, 2018)12:01 -Dragonwood (Darren Kisgen, AURUM, Inc., 2015)13:17 -Abyss (Bruno Cathala & Charles CHvallier, Bombyx, 2014)13:57 -Nidavellir (Serge Laget, GRRRE Games, 2020)14:58 -Beyond the Sun (Dennis K. Chan, Rio Grande Games, 2020)15:08 -Lost Ruins of Arnak (Elwen & Mín, CGE, 2020)15:49 -Bullet♥︎ (Joshua Van Laningham, Level 99 Games, 2021)18:18 -Project: ELITE (Konstantinos Kokkinis, Marco Portugal, & Sotirios Tsantilas, CMON, 2020) 19:44 -Warhammer Underworlds: Direchasm (David Sanders, Games Workshop, 2020)23:29 -The Shores of Tripoli (Kevin Bertram, Fort Circle Games, 2020)30:20 -Yura Yura Penguin (Yabuchi Ryoko, Self-Pub

CASSIUS: Did SVWAG say any thing?CASCA: Ay, they spoke Geek.CASSIUS: To what effect?CASCA: Nay, an I tell you that, I'll ne'er look you i' theface again: but those that understood them smiled atone another and shook their heads; but, for mine ownpart, it was Geek to me.01:54 AYURIS: Star Wars: Outer Rim (Corey Konieczka with Tony Fanchi, FFG, 2019) Games Played Last Week:03:30 -Paleo (Peter Rustemeyer, Hans im Glück, 2020)08:56 -MicroMacro: Crime City (Johannes Sich, Pegasus Spiele, 2020) 10:44 -Root: The Underworld Expansion (Patrick Leder & Cole Wehrle, Leder Games, 2020)13:30 -Ra (Reiner Knizia, alea, 1999)15:50 -Dune: Imperium (Paul Dennen, Dire Wolf, 2020)17:45 -Res Arcana: Lux et Tenebrae (Thoman Lehman, Sand Castle Games, 2019)19:23 -Beyond the Sun (Dennis K. Chan, Rio Grande Games, 2020)22:10 -Scape Goat (Jon Perry, Indie Boards & Cards, 2020)24:47 -Aquatica (Ivan Tuzovsky, Cosmodrome Games, 2019)26:42 -Flick of Faith (Paweł Stobiecki, Jan Truchanowicz, & Łukasz Włodarczyk, Awa

Round structure of Anachrony: I. Jump to the left phase.II. Step to the right phase.III. Bring your knees in tight phase.IV. Pelvic thrust phase.V. Drives you insane phase.Let's play Anachrony again! It's just...Games Played Last Week:01:25 -Barrage (Tommaso Battista & Simone Luciani, Cranio Creations, 2019)07:49 -Argent: Summer Break (Trey Chambers, Level 99 Games, 2014)11:19 -Warhammer Underworlds: Direchasm (David Sanders, Games Workshop, 2020)16:48 -Rum & Bones: Second Tide (Michael Shinall, CMON, 2017)20:55 -Scape Goat (Jon Perry, Indie Boards & Cards, 2020)24:06 -Yura Yura Penguin (Yabuchi Ryoko, Self-Published, 2020)26:18 -Hansa Teutonica: East Expansion (Andreas Steding, Argentum Verlag, 2010)28:33 -Pictures (Christian Stöhr & Daniela Stöhr, PD-Verlag, 2019)32:41 -Project: ELITE – R.O.O.K. Team (Konstantinos Kokkinis, Marco Portugal, & Sotirios Tsantilas, CMON, 2020)35:52 -MicroMacro: Crime City (Johannes Sich, Pegasus Spiele, 2020)38:38 -Pavlov's House (David Thompson,

The kids these days, what with their pokemons and their video games. The bleeping and the blooping. Personally I think civilization's gone downhill since Pong. It's all the colours! Pong had one too many colours if you ask me. What with the violence in the games and in the rock music and the hip hop... Hell in a handbasket.Coming soon to PS5: "Hell in a Handbasket" by EA.01:50 AYURIS: Hellboy: The Board Game (James M. Hewitt & Sophie Williams, Mantic Games, 2019)Games Played Last Week:03:22 -Cerebria: The Inside World (Richard Amann, Viktor Peter, István Pócsi, Frigyes Schőberl, Nick Shaw, & Dávid Turczi, Mindclash Games, 2018)05:54 -Shadowrift: Boomtown (Jeremy Anderson, Starling Games, 2020)08:28 -Horizon Wars: Zero Dark (Robey Jenkins, Precinct Omega Publishing, 2020)10:56 -Fuji Koro: Deluxe (Jerome Demeyere, Game Brewer, 2020)13:02 -Kingdom Rush: Rift in Time (Helana Hope, Sen-Foong Lim, & Jessey Wright, Lucky Duck Games, 2020)18:56 -Bloodborne: The Board Game (Eric M. Lang &am

Wheel, snipe, celly boys. Crushin' sandos. Superstar power poses? Pfft. I could run a clinic on this, boys. The flow, and the snow. That's it, tarps off boys! You looking for a tilly, buddy? It's time for a donnybrook! Ferda.Games Played Last Week:01:17 -Crystal Palace (Carsten Lauber, Feuerland Spiele, 2019)08:21 -Schotten Totten 2 (Reiner Knizia, IELLO, 2020)11:04 -Blackout: Hong Kong (Alexander Pfister, eggertspiele, 2018)15:20 -Cthulhu: Death May Die (Eric M. Lang & Rob Daviau, CMON, 2019) 17:14 -Anachrony: Fractures of Time (Richard Amann, Viktor Peter, Dávid Turczi, & Mindclash Games, 2020)23:38 -Scape Goat (Jon Perry, Indie Boards & Cards, 2020)26:33 -The Court of Miracles (Vincent Brugeas & Guilhem Gautrand, Lumberjacks Studio, 2019)29:07 -Res Arcana (Thomas Lehmann, Sand Castle Games, 2019)30:03 -Medina (Second Edition) (Stefan Dorra, Stronghold Games, 2014)31:47 -Pandemic Legacy: Season 0 (Rob Daviau & Matt Leacock, Z-Man Games, 2020) News (and why it doesn't matt

So. Many. Games. Could two humans play so many games in a mere week? Well, certainly no humans that aren't preternaturally devoted to their dear listeners. But we are devoted, and your mere idlest of wishes is our most sacrosanct of commands; and so, brutal though taskmasters that you are, you bid us play so. Many. Games.01:19 AYURIS: Asgard's Chosen (Morgan Dontanville, Mayfair Games, 2013)Games Played Last Week:03:43 -Sumatra (Reiner Knizia, Ludonova, 2020)07:34 -Tajuto (Reiner Knizia, Super Meeple, 2019)11:40 -Scape Goat (Jon Perry, Indie Boards & Cards, 2020)15:10 -Agricola (Revised Edition) (Uwe Rosenberg, Lookout Games, 2016)18:08 -Super-Skill Pinball: 4-Cade (Geoff Engelstein, WizKids, 2020)21:10 -Steven Universe: Beach-a-Palooza Card Battling Game (Erica Bouyouris & Andrew Wolf, Cryptozoic Entertainment, 2020)26:13 -Ausonia (Zoltán Simon, Lycan Studio, 2021)28:51 -The Taverns of Tiefenthal (Wolfgang Warsch, Schmidt Spiel, 2019)30:00 -Yura Yura Penguin (Yabuchi Ryoko, Self-Published, 20

One portentious day, Uwe Rosenberg will design a worker-placement game where polyomino sheep breed by being sown into fields that are also special power cards, and the Great Cycle will be complete. No one knows what happens then, and quite frankly we are too afraid to ask.Games Played Last Week:01:33 -Anachrony: Fractures of Time (Richard Amann, Viktor Peter, Dávid Turczi, & Mindclash Games, 2020)08:15 -Honey Buzz (Paul Salomon, Elf Creek Games, 2020)14:56 -The Crew: The Quest for Planet Nine (Thomas Sing, KOSMOS, 2019)16:46 -Flick of Faith (Paweł Stobiecki, Jan Truchanowicz, & Łukasz Włodarczyk, Awaken Realms Lite, 2019)18:54 -Paris (Michael Kiesling & Wolfgang Kramer, Game Brewer, 2020)26:55 -Guards of Atlantis II: Tabletop MOBA (Artyom Nichipurov, Wolff Designa, 2021)29:46 -Dice Hospital (Stan Kordonskiy & Mike Nudd, Alley Cat Games, 2018)News (and why it doesn't matter):31:21 Red Rising from Stonemaier Games32:03 Assault on Doomrock: Ultimate Edition33:26 Oink Games on Kickstarter34:08

"My defense, Your Honour, was that I was specifically mandated by the rulebook issued by M. Xavier Georges and Quined Games to violate the lockdown restrictions issued by the Province of Ontario. I would put to you that it is unjust for the government to force me to choose between public heath measures backed by civil sanction on the one hand, and being a dirty dirty cheater on the other. Why are you all looking at me like that?"01:37 AYURIS: Gentes: Deluxified (Stefan Risthaus, Tasty Minstrel, 2018) Games Played Last Week:06:04 -Age of Industry (Martin Wallace, Treefrog Games, 2010)12:20 -Aquatica (Ivan Tuzovsky, Cosmodrome Games, 2019)16:09 -Russian Railroads (Helmut Ohley & Leanhard "Lonny" Orgler, Hans im Gluck, 2013)17:52 -Skytear (Giacomo Neri, Riccardo Neri, & Riccardo Parmeggiani, PvP Geeks, 2020)21:47 -La Granja (Michael Keller & Andreas "ode." Odendahl, Spielworxx, 2014)23:58 -Paris Connection (John Bohrer, Queen Games, 2010)26:23 -Anachrony (Dávid Turczi, Mindcla

Board Game Arena gets more and more of our gaming time, what with its snappy interface and minimal system requirements. The sound effects, though, are controversial. The community seems divided on whether the whooshes are pleasing or distracting, and whether the knock-knock-knock sound is charming or nerve-wracking. We have heard the noise accused of being evocative of imminent swatting, which seems excessive but potentially horrifying.Games Played Last Week:01:07 -The Crew: The Quest for Planet Nine (Thomas Sing, KOSMOS, 2019)05:23 -MicroMacro: Crime City (Johannes Sich, Pegasus Spiele, 2020)08:26 -Flick Wars (Shaun Austin & Andrew Tullsen, Breaking Games, 2019)10:46 -No Thanks! (Thorsten Gimmler, AMIGI, 2005)10:52 -Paris Connection (John Bohrer, Queen Games, 2010)11:42 -Nippon (Nuno Bizarro Sentieiro & Paulo Soledade, What's Your Game?, 2015)16:30 -Carnegie (Xavier Georges, Quined Games, 2021)18:43 -A Billion Suns: Interstellar Fleet Battles (Mike Hutchinson, Osprey Games, 2021)24:33 -Hallertau

If you've been following board games social media recently, you might have noticed that it's been a rough couple of weeks. Incidents like these, albeit difficult, allow us a chance to define our community and underscore our values. Silence can imply consent. We can either choose to silently defend powerful figures use their influence to harm vulnerable people without consequence, or we can choose to try and speak up to become a more welcoming and inclusive community. So Very Wrong About Games chooses to try to do the latter.00:57 Our statement on Phil Eklund and Daniele Tascini04:24 AYURIS: Warpgate (Artyom Nichipurov, Wolff Designa, 2018) Games Played Last Week:06:46 -Darwin’s Journey (Simone Luciani & Nestore Mangone, ThunderGryph Games, 2021)12:20 -Dinosaur Tea Party (Rob Daviau, JR Honeycutt, & Justin D. Jacobson, Restoration Games, 2018)17:00 -Calimala (Fabio Lopiano, ADC Blackfire Entertainment GmbH, 2017)20:11 -Cosmic Frog (Jim Felli, Devious Weasel Games, 2020)23:31 -Yokohama (Hisashi

Too much news! So much news, in fact, that we had to cut some news. Some news, though news-y, will keep until next week. The key is to wrap the roots of the news in damp paper towel, put the news in a plastic bag, and put the bag in the fridge. The news will keep up to a couple weeks that way, whereas it would have become limp news on the counter in as little as a day. Games Played Last Week:01:11 -By Stealth and Sea (Nicola Saggini & David Thompson, DVG Games, 2020)06:02 -Dinosaur Tea Party (Rob Daviau, JR Honeycutt, & Justin D. Jacobson, Restoration Games, 2018)09:43 -Guards of Atlantis II: Tabletop MOBA (Artyom Nichipurov, Wolff Designa, 2021)14:27 -Iwari: Deluxe Edition (Michael Schacht, ThunderGryph Games, 2020)17:33 -BattleCON: Unleashed (D. Brad Talton, Level 99 Games, 2020)21:01 -Whistle Mountain (Scott Caputo & Luke Laurie, Bézier Games, 2020)24:16 -Charterstone (Jamey Stegmaier, Stonemaier Games, 2017)News (and why it doesn't matter):26:31 Leftover animal mentions: Kabuto Sumo, Crash