Dialogue On Divorce

In the early days of her family law practice, Heather Quick noticed a troubling pattern among the women she represented. Women often undervalued what they brought to the marriage and failed to stand up for themselves in the divorce process. So, what can women do to change their mindset around divorce and fight for what they deserve? Heather Quick is Founder and CEO of Florida Women’s Law Group, the only divorce and family law firm in Northeast Florida that serves women exclusively. Consistent with her message of women's empowerment, Heather has published several books on divorce and business, including Women’s Guide to Divorce in Florida and Women’s Guide to Becoming a Successful Entrepreneur. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Heather joins Katherine to discuss the unique challenges facing women in divorce, from stay-at-home moms to female breadwinners. Heather explains how women compromise on finances to protect their children and why that’s a bad idea, challenging couples to stop using their chil

If you’re going through a divorce, writing a love letter is probably the last thing on your mind. But Jennifer Lee, AWMA, AIF, suggests that sharing your values and hopes for the future in a family love letter to your children is a good first step for financial planning in divorce. So, how does a love letter help you set meaningful financial goals and make better money decisions? Jennifer is the founder of Modern Wealth, a Sarasota-based financial firm with a focus on helping individuals in transition, and author of Squeeze the Juice: Live with Purpose, Then Leave a Legacy. Jennifer brings a fresh perspective on the financial planning process by digging deep to understand her clients’ values and helping them use money as a tool to accomplish their dreams. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Jennifer joins Katherine to share the personal experience that inspired her idea for a family love letter in the financial planning process. Jennifer explains why financial anxiety is such a common issue in the div

Asking your partner for a divorce is challenging under any circumstances. But the conversation can be downright dangerous if you’re leaving an abusive spouse. In fact, upwards of 70% of women who leave an abusive spouse are murdered. So, what resources are available to victims of intimate partner violence? How do you mitigate the risks associated with divorcing an abuser? Beverly Price is the driving force behind Her Empowered Divorce, a coaching practice that has supported thousands of women facing the most challenging aspects of divorce. Beverly is also the visionary behind the Divorce Coalition, a network of divorce professionals and survivor advocates united to transform the landscape of domestic abuse. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Beverly joins Katherine to explore the impact of domestic abuse in divorce and explain why you shouldn’t leave an abuser without a safety plan. Beverly discusses the benefit of having a divorce coach, describing how she offers clients education and preparation

Is your relationship causing you a great deal of stress? Do you suspect that your partner has a diagnosable mental illness? In such a challenging situation, it’s human nature to blame the other person in the relationship. To label their behavior as wrong and ask, ‘Why won’t they change?’ But if their mental health is in question, they may not be able to change. And the better question is, ‘What is YOUR next right step?’ Judy Herman is a mental health professional and relationship wellness advocate dedicated to equipping high-achieving women in the helping professions go from trauma drama into vibrant karma. Judy is also the host of Better Relationships, Better Life: The Podcast and author of Beyond Messy Relationships and Relationships with Purpose. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Judy joins Katherine to explain how her personal experience as a twice-divorced relationship therapist inspired her to write Relationships with Purpose. Judy discusses what differentiates someone with self-centered char

If you aren’t fully informed about your finances in marriage, you can’t negotiate from a level playing field in divorce. That’s why Adrienne Grace is committed to helping women with what she calls holistic financial planning. So, what is holistic financial planning? How can it help you negotiate a realistic divorce settlement and build a plan for the future? Adrienne is the Women’s Wealth Advocate and Holistic Financial Planner behind Transitioning Finances, a platform where she guides women and couples to successfully negotiate divorce settlements, survive financial transitions and rebuild afterward. Adrienne has 30-plus years of experience working in every area of the financial world, and she is passionate about helping you overcome your financial challenges and move empowered into the next phase of your life. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Adrienne joins Katherine to discuss why the inability to communicate about money is often the cause of divorce. Adrienne explains how she helps people under

What do you need to know about filing your taxes during or after divorce? Are asset transfers taxable? What about alimony and child support? Who claims the children? And what if your ex mishandled the finances and there’s tax debt you knew nothing about? Tax Attorney Hubert Johnson is Founder of Guardian Tax Law, where he has assisted thousands of individuals and businesses dealing with IRS and state tax issues. Hubert lectures to tax professionals in seminars and training sessions across the country and has cowritten two books on tax debt resolution. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Hubert joins Katherine to answer your questions around tax issues in divorce, explaining where to go for tax information if your soon-to-be-ex handled the finances. Hubert walks us through the pros and cons of delaying divorce to file taxes jointly and discusses when asset transfers are a taxable event—and when they’re not. Listen in for Hubert’s insight on the tax rules around alimony and child support and learn wh

Julie Rountree began her career as a divorce attorney. And she quickly realized that clients expected her to be both their legal advocate and counselor. But it was very difficult to wear both hats. Julie recognized that her clients needed someone to help them navigate the emotions of divorce. That’s when she stumbled on divorce coaching and thought, ‘This is professional who’s been missing from the divorce litigation team.’ Today, Julie is the Certified Divorce Coach behind Divorce Coaching Solutions, a practice that helps clients navigate the frustration of divorce, grow their confidence, and transition into life beyond divorce. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Julie joins Katherine to discuss her role in helping people work through their emotions, articulate their goals, and manage expectations around divorce. Julie walks us through what a divorce coach does for their clients, describing how she helps people become and remain the best version of themselves through the process. Listen in for

We all assume that when we get divorced, things are going to get better. But when a marriage ends, communication is usually at a low point. And that communication style tends to stick, which causes ongoing conflict in the co-parenting relationship. So, what can you do to interrupt that conflict dynamic with your ex? How do you build a constructive, positive co-parenting relationship? Jenni Rock is the creator of Co-Parenting Without Conflict, a coaching practice that helps divorced parents exit toxic relationships and communicate in a way that prioritizes the needs of their children. Jenni brings a wealth of knowledge and expertise to the table, helping parents navigate the often-challenging terrain of co-parenting after a divorce. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Jenni joins Katherine to share the story of her own horrific divorce and explain how that experience informs her work in co-parenting conflict resolution. Jenni discusses the most common conflicts in co-parenting relationships and descr

Do you suspect that your soon-to-be-ex-spouse is hiding money? If your partner is trying to avoid equitable distribution in a divorce settlement, they might be keeping assets from you or transferring money into a secret account. But is it necessary to hire a forensic accountant? Or can you do the job yourself? Tracey Coenen is a renowned forensic accountant and the brains behind the Divorce Money Guide. She is also the author of the book Find Me the Money and host of the podcast of the same name. Tracey is passionate about helping people who feel powerless in the divorce process regain their confidence and take control of their money. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Tracey joins Katherine to explain how to identify when your spouse is hiding money and where they might be keeping it. Tracey walks us through the common reasons why people hide money in a marriage and describes why financial infidelity is just as devastating as romantic infidelity—if not more. Listen in for Tracey’s insight on initi

What story are you telling yourself about your divorce? Blaming your ex may seem justified, but that story only gets you stuck in a victim mentality with no control over your own life. So, how do you rewrite your story and start building an empowered life post-divorce? Kimberly Kelley is the neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) practitioner and hypnotherapist behind Reinvent Yourself, a program that helps newly single people create the life they want. She is also the author of No Blame No Shame: Living an Empowered Life After Divorce, where she describes the profound changes she made after her own marriage of 30 years came to an end. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Kimberly joins Katherine to discuss how the stories we tell ourselves affect our experience of divorce. Kimberly explains how the internal shame of another failed marriage drove her fears around what other people would think and describes how hypnotherapy empowered her to imagine a life beyond divorce. Listen in for Kimberly’s advice on

Wonder what your kids are experiencing during the divorce process? What if you could ask adult children of divorce for advice? Grace Casper became a child of divorce at the age of eight. By age 10, she had written the first draft of her book, Dear Parents: Notes from a Child of Divorce by Grace Casper. Today, Grace runs Divorce Tips from Kids, a platform dedicated to helping families navigate divorce, and hosts Divorce: What I Wish My Parents Knew, a podcast about divorce from the kids’ perspective. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Grace joins Katherine to describe the pressure she felt to be the source of her parents’ happiness after their divorce. Grace explains what inspired her to write about her parents’ divorce and how we can apply Grace’s story in Dear Parents to our own individual circumstances. Listen in for insight on the commoditization of kids in divorce negotiations and learn how Grace’s resources can help you improve the experience of divorce for your children. Topics Covered Wha

Worried thoughts about the future generate anxiety. And divorce begets an uncertain future. So, it’s no surprise that anxiety is such a common emotion in divorce. But how do you navigate that anxiety without getting overwhelmed in the process? Bernadette Purcell is Founder of Shore Behavioral Health, a practice that helps patients with anxiety disorders enjoy more fulfilling lives and supports individuals and couples through all phases of divorce. A licensed clinical social worker in private practice since 2008, Bernadette is also the author of Divorced as F* in Seven Spiritual Steps. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Bernadette joins Katherine to discuss how worry impacts the divorce process and what to do about it. Bernadette explains how to prevent worry from turning into anxiety, challenging you to surrender to the fact that divorce is happening and leverage acceptance to take the next right step for you. Listen in for insight on getting comfortable with uncertainty and learn Bernadette’s to

Divorce makes us feel vulnerable. And many of us lawyer up and come out swinging to protect ourselves. But what if there’s a more effective way to reach an agreement with your ex? What if a little self-reflection early on can help you improve the process of working with a divorce professional? Jacinta Gallant is a respected lawyer, mediator and educator recognized internationally for her innovative approach to conflict resolution training. Jacinta’s Our Family in Two Homes resources for divorce professionals help their clients prepare for effective dispute resolution. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Jacinta joins Katherine to share her journey from cutthroat divorce litigator to effective mediator, describing how she leverages curiosity to understand clients on a deeper level and deliver what they need. Jacinta walks us through the reflection questions she encourages people to ask themselves before they meet with a divorce lawyer and explains how divorce attorneys serve clients better when they d

If your marriage is ending, you may be convinced that things will never be good again. But what if I told you there is a way to stay positive, even during a divorce? To feel less vulnerable in stressful situations? And change the dynamic of conversations with your ex? Bill Carmody serves as Chief Coaching Officer for Positive Intelligence, where he oversees the application of mental fitness for thousands of coaches worldwide. Bill is also the author of the bestselling book The 3 Rules of Marriage, and he is dedicated to being an inspirational leader who creates breakthroughs for himself and solves problems for others. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Bill joins Katherine to explain how Positive Intelligence strategies can help you be less reactive in stressful situations and stay positive regardless of your circumstances. Bill shares his approach to making progress in high-conflict conversations, challenging us to develop mental fitness and stop the cycle of judgement when we feel criticized by ou

According to the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, divorce is the second most stressful life event after the death of a spouse. And that stress has an impact on our food choices and overall health. So, how might we leverage integrative nutrition to make positive, lasting lifestyle changes while we’re coping with divorce? Suzy Wood is the Integrative Nutrition Health Coach behind True Wellness Within, a platform that helps people make healthy food and lifestyle choices and rebuild their lives after the stress of divorce. Suzy’s divorce was a calling card to reinvent herself, inspiring her to leave a career in high tech marketing to start her own business and live her best life. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Suzy joins Katherine to discuss the 12 lifestyle factors that must be in balance for you to live a healthy life. Suzy shares tips for finding an avenue for self-care to help you detox during or after divorce and discusses the importance of discerning what divorce advice works for you—and what doe

Traditional coparenting arrangements put the focus on the divorcing couple. They establish new, separate households, and the kids go back and forth. But what happens if you shift your focus and build a coparenting plan around the children? When Bill DeSalvo’s ex-wife introduced him to the idea of nesting, he had misgivings. But he was open to the alternative because of its benefits for his kids. On the last episode of Divorce Dialogues, Bill’s ex-wife, Beth Behrendt, walked us through the fundamentals of nesting, a coparenting strategy in which the children stay in the family home and the parents move in and out. Today, Bill joins Katherine to discuss the experience of nesting from his perspective, sharing the logistical questions he had around how it would work and how their arrangement has evolved over time. Bill explains what he learned about himself through nesting and describes the mutual respect he and Beth established by putting rules in place early on. Listen in for Bill’s advice on building

Separated parents often worry about the upheaval a divorce causes in their kids’ lives, especially the stress that comes with moving back and forth between two households. But what if you could give your children the security of staying in the family home? Nesting allows kids to do just that. And it’s the parents who move in and out. So, how does nesting work? Is it right for your family? Beth Behrendt is the author of Nesting After Divorce: Co-Parenting in the Family Home. A freelance writer and single mother of three, Beth has shared her nesting experiences in several national publications, including The New York Times and Psychology Today. She is also a regular contributor to Divorce Magazine and Laura Wasser’s It’s Over Easy. Beth built Family Nesting to offer advice to other families considering this unique approach to divorce. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Beth joins Katherine to explain why she and her ex-husband made the decision to try nesting and how the arrangement benefits their fam

At the beginning of a new romance, we’re not worried about repeating the unhealthy patterns that ended our previous relationships. We tell ourselves that this one is different. But statistics tell a different story. The divorce rate is 41% for first marriages, 60% for second marriages and 73% the third time around. So, what’s behind those dismal statistics? And what can we do to heal a disappointing love life? Dr. Thomas Jordan is a clinical psychologist and a psychoanalyst in private practice in New York City. He also serves on the faculty of the NYU Postdoctoral Program in Psychoanalysis. Dr. Jordan founded the Love Life Learning Center to help people strengthen their ability to form and sustain healthy relationships, and he is the author of Learn to Love: A Guide to Healing Your Disappointing Love Life. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Dr. Jordan joins Katherine to discuss the three features of a disappointing love life, describing how we unconsciously repeat unhealthy patterns learned in chil

Many people are overburdened with expenses after divorce. So, what options do you have when the cost of living on your own becomes overwhelming and you get into financial trouble? Though it is a last resort, sometimes filing for bankruptcy is the best way to eliminate some of your debt and get back on your feet. So, how do divorce and bankruptcy law work together? What do you need to know about declaring bankruptcy in divorce? Dawn Kirby is the cofounder of Kirby Aisner & Curley LLP, a women-owned law firm that represents corporate and consumer debtors and creditors in bankruptcy and restructuring matters. Dawn has more than 25 years of experience as a bankruptcy attorney, and she cofounded the pro se bankruptcy clinic at Legal Services of the Hudson Valley, which provides bankruptcy counseling to individuals who fall below the Federal poverty line. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Dawn joins Katherine to explain why divorce is among the most common causes of bankruptcy and when to file for chapter

If you’re going through a divorce, you’ve likely fallen into what David Emerald Womeldorff calls the Dreaded Drama Triangle or DDT. But this framework keeps you and your ex focused on your problems rather than the outcomes you want. So, what is the antidote to the toxicity of DDT? How do you shift out of fear and reactivity into creativity and empowerment? David is the Creator-in-Chief of The Empowerment Dynamic and Cofounder of the Bainbridge Leadership Center. He is also the bestselling author many books, including The Power of TED: The Empowerment Dynamic. On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, David joins Katherine to explain the concept of the Dreaded Drama Triangle, exploring how the traditional approach to divorce perpetuates the DDT. David describes why we fall into the roles of victim, persecutor or rescuer in divorce and challenges us to leverage The Empowerment Dynamic as an antidote to DDT. Listen in for David’s insight on applying TED to the circumstances of divorce and learn how to disrupt