Nathan Rabin's Happy Cast

This week, Travolta and Cage’s timelines finally merge with two certified stinkers from 1991! Podcaster extraordinaire and recurring guest Alonso Duralde (Linoleum Knife, Who Shot Ya?, a million others) takes the ferry to N’Awlins with us to steep in the sweaty, clumsy erotic thrills of Zandalee, in which Nic Cage plays a tortured artist who livens up the sex life of repressed trophy wife Zandalee (Erika Anderson), much to the consternation of frustrated poet Thierry (Judge Reinhold). The sex scenes are just as unfortunate as the facial hair, and there’s much more Tennessee Williams melodrama — and accidental blackface — to be found! From there, we hop from The Big Easy to The Magic City of Miami for Chains of Gold, a Travolta-penned Miami Vice knockoff about an ad executive-turned-social-worker-who-might-as-well-be-a-cop who tries to save his young charge (baby Joey Lawrence) from the clutches of a crack slavery gang run by Benjamin Bratt. Early-’90s War on Drugs pandering, a spangly Marilu Henner, and an el