The Liberation Project: A Movement For Manhood

A lot of men are being called "boys" or "boyish." The separation between boy and man has been blended to the point that most people don't know when they "become men." In this episode, Justin and Blair interview Kris Wolfe (founder of Goodguyswag.com) about how to become a man. You'll be shocked at what you'll learn.

There are a few personality types that just get under our skin. Some people are abrasive, others are mean, still others can't keep a secret to save their lives. In this very special episode, Justin and Blair discuss the top ten personality traits that are difficult to deal with...and how we all have a little of these traits with us. More importantly, they explain what these traits are actually indicating about our strengths and talents. This is a pretty epic episode, so to get the "deep dive," we created a worksheet. You can download it at www.theliberationproject.com/personalitytypes. Here are a few top level highlights:  “Blissfully unaware person is usually fueled by shame.” –JS “The critique is rarely engaged.” –BR “Martyrs get their identity from sacrifice.” –BR “You cannot validate the victim enough.” –JS “Overachievers are visionaries who are trying to prove themselves.” “In the area of your greatest weakness is tied to your greatest strength.” –JS “People who overcome rejection have a beautiful gift o

Want to make a big impact with your life? Do you want to create something that will continue after your death? Of course you do. We all do. In this episode, Justin and Blair discuss the concept of creating a legacy, and why a legacy is beyond just what you “give people” when you die. Highlights from the Episode:   Legacy is building something that lasts beyond ourselves. Legacy is as much about contributing to people in the present, as it is giving people something in the future. Short-term living is exhausting. Long-term living allows us to overcome obstacles and have direction for our lives. We must be able to see the “bigger picture” to deeply enjoy life. If you are living day-to-day, you are not building a legacy. Micro-investments every day contribute to major gain. Building momentum requires that we create a history of stewardship.When you get behind the curtain of successful people, they’ve always paid the price for years before their “overnight breakthroughs.”

Purpose is a big word. It can mean something different to everyone you ask. But universally, we want to have purpose in our lives...and we live richer lives when we have purpose. In this episode, Blair and Justin break down the meaning of purpose, how to attain a purposeful life, and what to do when you can't find it!   A Few Highlights from the Episode: “Purpose is a feeling, it’s internal.” –BR “If you find your purpose in the external you will never be satisfied.” –BR “When we come into rest, its natural that we will come into our purpose.” –BR “Our external world is a byproduct of our internal purpose.” –JS “So many of us are not willing to live in our external purpose because we aren’t willing to be present.” –BR “Don’t look for a grand purpose, rather look for the places in your life that is displaying who you really are.” –BR “The tree that remains will produce fruit over and over again.” –JS “Find an outlet to express your authentic self and you will naturally live from yourpurpose.” –BR

All of us wrestle with the concept of being powerful. What does it mean for us to be powerful, or powerless, as an individual? Blair and Justin discuss when we are giving away our power, when we are owning our power, and how we can step into being a powerful person!   Show Highlights: Being a powerful person includes the capacity to be intimate and powerful. Being powerful is a journey. It's never complete, and it should continue to grow as you mature. A powerful person has self-value. Their value is not sourced in their circumstances, but their person. Someone who doesn't have self-value can be influential, but not powerful. Power is an internal disposition. Powerful people have clear boundaries. A powerful person is a clear communicator. A powerful person isn't selfish. They are empathetic, sympathetic, and compassionate for others. A powerful person gives other people the benefit of the doubt. A powerful person takes responsibility over their lives. A powerless person blames everyone else for their circums

In this lighthearted episode, Justin and Blair reflect on a few of the reasons it's great to be a man. They remind men of why sometimes, it pays to be a guy. They explain a few of the perks of manhood, but also explain some of the deeper reasons that guys should be thankful of their role as a man.   A Few of the Highlights: “We get to pee standing up.” –JS “We have natural scarves for our face.” -JS “I can grow my own blanket.” -JS “We don’t have to give birth.” “I get the joy of getting to be a leader who gets to cover their wife.” –JS “I get to step into a role that calls me in from being a boy to a man.” –JS    

Most people are expending a lot of energy trying to help others feel loved. But most times, they aren't receiving the love the way it was intended. In this episode, Justin and Blair share how easy it is to love others, and have them FEEL our love.    

Male leadership is one of the most misunderstood, and controversial topics being discussed today. Everyone has an opinion, and most people are uncomfortable with the the idea that "men are supposed to lead the household." For the last generation, the idea has seemed toxic. In today's episode, Justin and Blair discuss what it means to lead, and frankly, what it doesn't.    A Few Highlights: Our culture looks at authority as dominating. –JS What does it look like to live balanced lifestyles where we all feel empowered? -JS Two powerful people is a relationship, one powerful person is a dictatorship. –BR The greatest leader is someone who is the greatest servant. This starts with ownership. –JS I want to take ownership of the hearts of the people inside this relationship.  –JS What is ownership?  It’s choosing to take all of I am and use this to promote your dreams and desires forward. –JS There must be a root of respect within our family structure.  –JS Fear is the driving force for people jumping into control.

Romance is a mystery to most men. We want to be good at it...but we just don't understand how to romance a woman effectively. In this episode, we invite Abi Stumvoll (Justin Stumvoll's wife) to explain how to romance a woman. We discuss how to romance throughout your relationship, and help your "significant other" to feel loved.   The “newness” of a relationship is replaced with safety and rest when love matures. There is an unconditional love that matures the longer you’ve been married. Fun and play is romance. When you are loved in your love languages, you are naturally provoked to love. When you create an “emotional connection” through sex, you’re drawn to having more sex. Create safety for the person your pursuing. Don’t make situations “high stakes.” Do things to let people know that you’re “thinking about them.” As men, we must be powerful and weak. If we don't have needs, a woman doesn't have something to offer a man. We must allow ourselves to have needs, to allow others to love us. In a relationship,

Being anxious or depressed is the worst. In this light-hearted episode about depression, Justin and Blair tackle one of the biggest psychological hurdles...stress and depression. You'll find hope and inspiration for your journey, or learn how to communicate with people who are walking through depression themselves.   “Depression is emotions that have been back logged.” –BR “Hopelessness is a form of depression.” –JS “If you have an ‘I don’t care’ attitude about everything, you are probably avoiding pain.” –JS “If we can’t change our external, we have to find a way to find our power internally.” –JS “When we don’t believe we have the capacity to manage our inner-world, we feel out of control and easily disappointed.” –JS “When we don’t have purpose, depression is an easy exit ramp.” –JS “The idea of finding purpose begins with settling and enjoying the present moment we are in regardless of our present circumstances.” –JS “A lot of us are living in depression because we are self-focused and living isolated and

When men get older, they often find that they lose their passion for life, and often lose the ability to experience wonder. However, wonder is necessary to enjoy life and embrace creativity. In this episode, Justin and Blair discuss the relevance of wonder in a man’s life.   You have to be childlike in order to truly be a man. -BR There is a difference between childlike and childish. - BR The reason that men are shutdown and unhappy is that they have not let out the kid within. - BR If a man doesn’t have a creative outlet, they’ll start to die in life. -BR Childlikeness can be an adult that can enter into their kid’s world of adventure. -JS Being in a state of wonder is allowing yourself to be “in a moment.” - JS Being childlike allows you to create without trying to be productive. -BR Everything is not a task. -JS Children don’t live with limitation. To be childlike, we have to be restored to the idea of limitlessness. -JS We are starving for creativity and the ability to play. -BR Many people have stopped b

Does confrontation intimidate you? For most people, it's terrifying. In this episode, Justin and Blair discuss how to confront with love. Confrontation is supposed to be an opportunity to grow in intimacy...but most often, it is used to divide. In this episode, you'll learn how to confront effectively.   "Confrontation shouldn't come out of nowhere." -JS "It takes a lot of self-esteem to healthily take feedback." -BR “Confrontation should be about connecting and restoring our relationships.” –BR “For most people, confrontation is high stakes and the biggest bull dozer wins.” –JS “If we make confrontation about the behavior rather than the person, we can work together to solve the conflict.”  -JS “The reason we project anger on another person is because we want them to feel our pain.” – BR “Our highest goal in confrontation has to be connection.” –JS “When powerless comes in we will do everything subconsciously to gain our power back.” –JS “The number one thing that keeps us from responding well in confrontati

Is singleness a curse? Are you someone that wants to be in a relationship, or wants to enjoy your season of singleness? If so, this episode is for you. Justin and Blair focus on Blair’s perpetual singleness, and how to enjoy being single (and prepare yourself for a future relationship).   Show Highlights: Marriage is a holy season, but singleness is also a holy season. Don’t live for the life you will have, instead of engaging in the life you do have. -BR. When you fall in love with life, you are 10X more attractive. -BR Desperation is not attractive. -JS What you want will evolve. Choose for the long-term. -JS People are afraid of being satisfied while single, because they believe it will prevent them from getting married. - JS Who I want to become is who I will attract. -JS Spend time becoming the person you want to attract. -BR You’ll always find your someone with the same level of emotional health. -BR People always have equal levels of dysfunction, but it may represent differently. -JS We are attracted t

Sometimes we have to be fully transparent, instead of “shielding” our partner from our feelings and thoughts. In this episode, Blair and Justin discuss how to communicate vulnerable topics like being attracted to others, and when others are flirting with you (and you kind of want to flirt back).   Highlights from the Show: “Just because you get into a relationship doesn’t mean that you stop seeing beautiful people.”   “When someone gets into a relationship, they become more attractive.”   “By being transparent, you have the opportunity to have transformation.”    “Forgiveness isn’t sweeping poor behavior under the rug, but an opportunity to understand why someone is acting out…and get healing.”   “Trust is built through our cleaning up of our messes.”   “Ask yourself, how do my relationships reflect how I feel about myself?”   “We can’t control our partner's feelings.”   “When we respond poorly to our partners sharing their feelings, we are teaching them that they are not safe to share with us.”   “We are oft

Homosexuality, and homosexual rights, is a hot-button topic. It seems like everybody has a strong opinion about same-sex attraction, but is there a compassionate road to respecting people of differing opinions? In this episode, Blair and Justin discuss homosexuality in depth. Highlights:  "When I acted out as a child, I was convinced if people knew it would disqualify me from relationship and connection." -JS "Currently, in our culture we are at war. There is a line drawn in the sand saying you are born this way or you are wrong." -JS "Homosexuality is often a symptom that is representing something going on below the surface." -BR "We need to give people an invitation to go on a journey of self discovery and self-value." -BR "When you tell people they are 'born this way' you are taking away their voice and their freedom." -JS  "In order for us to find freedom we have to give ourselves permission to go on a journey." -JS  "How about we just see the person?" -BR  "The greatest gift we are given in life is the f

There is a phenomenon called "The Needless Man." Basically, it is when men don't have a value for their desires or hopes. They walk through life like zombies, and are completely unaware of what they want anymore. In this episode, Justin and Blair discuss how most men don't know that they have needs, and know even less how to get them met.   Here are a few highlights: -The needless man is a person that doesn't have expectation or desires.  -Loving someone is not, not demanding anything from them. -Getting your needs met is not a demand from another person, but an invitation into intimacy. -Getting needs met is a two-way street.  -You can be a needless man or needless woman. -One of the reasons people don't "have needs" is because they don't believe there can be a balance...In other words, someone has to surrender. -Sometimes we are lying to ourselves about what we really need. -A few needs guys have is: recreation, getting their connection needs met, and to have a voice. 

Sometimes, days just suck. You can't deny it...it's just hard. So what do we do when we have a terrible day? Do we run? Sit in it? Invite people into it? In this episode, Blair and justin discuss the idea of having a crappy day, and how to respond.   A few highlights of the episode: - The most powerful way to love someone is to be present with them (not to fix them!). - We have to be vulnerable and empathetic when we are connecting with someone else's pain.  - Processing pain requires us to "get behind" the anger, and allow ourselves to feel sad or disappointed.  - We have emotions and they are going to be felt...it just matters how and when. - You must give yourself time to be present with your emotions. - If you sit in the present, your authentic emotions will emerge. - Create relationships where people can be present with you as you are going through emotions.

What is a bromance? Is it a ridiculous concept, or something that we need in order to be healthy and happy? In this episode, Justin and Blair discuss the idea of the platonic male relationship. They discuss what it takes to be close to other guys.   Here are a few highlights: - We need to have a list of traits we're looking for in male relationships. - We need to be intentional about finding and nurturing male relationships.  - It's important to have several male relationships, and not become overly focused on one.  - Most males are starving for male intimacy. - Bromances are actually just male friendships between two healthy people. - It's important to take baby steps when forming close male relationships.  - It's our responsibility to invite in healthy people and keep out toxic ones.  

Relationships are Two Powerful People is a breakdown on healthy connection between two people. Justin and Blair explain how most relationships operate (one-sided) and how relationships can operate (two-sided and enjoyable!).  The Liberation Project Notes Episode 12: “Relationships are Two Powerful People”   “Many people equate agreeing with each other as the same thing  as intimacy.” –BR “If your self value is wrapped up in your ideas, you will break relationships with people who disagree with you.” –BR “The only way two powerful people can exist inside a relationship is if there is an invitation to respect.” –JS “Respect can’t exist when I have something to prove.” –JS “If your identity is based in belief systems you will always feel powerless.” -JS “If you equate people agreeing with you as them caring about you then you can never institute respect because you will always feel disrespect in disagreement” –JS “When our value is established in agreement of opinions, when someone disagrees with you, you are al

  Are you ready to have better sex? Are you ready to have sex that both partners love and look forward to? In this episode, Justin and Blair discuss what it takes to feel sexy, have great sex, and to connect with your sex-mate. Yeah, we said sex-mate. Here are a few quotes from the episode: -I’m here because I choose you, not because I am taking from you or getting something I need. –JS -If you can manage your sexuality, and invest in the relationship, you are making decisions that will affect decades. –BR -When you have sex with someone, your emotions are telling you the relationship is something that it’s not. –JS -Your body is writing checks, your emotions can’t cash. –BR -There are people who learned to bond over sexuality rather than emotions. –JS -When you are your wife’s hero, sex becomes mind blowing. –JS -We need to diversify our portfolio when it comes to creating intimacy with our wives. And when we do that we’ll be more fulfilled, and they will be more connected and engaged. –BR -Women are being s