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How to Set Expectations and Get Results I can’t remember a time in my life when expectations didn’t significantly impact every minute and hour of every day of my life. No matter who you are, you have a million expectations inside your mind — and don’t get me started about expectations that others have for you.  Years ago, I developed an awareness of how expectations control our lives and settled on an engineering model to guide me along my path. The model is called the Feed-Forward/Feedback Model. The first step in the FFFM model is to become aware of everything happening in your life.  Next, set an expectation for any event, goal, relationship, or life situation that you have in your life. Once set, your only job is to observe whether you are getting what you desire. If not, and there is always an if not, notice the discrepancy and update your expectation based on real-life results.  Continue observing your result and making adjustments until you get the expected result. It looks like this: expectation, obse

Two Words That Will Change Your Life: Slow Down While recovering from Total Hip Replacement, I engaged with a client on a Zoom call. He shared one of his favorite sayings, “Slow is fast, fast is slow,” which made me angry. Why? First Responders practice “Slow is fast, fast is slow” all the time, so you never see them running to the scene. Pacing themselves is simply safer, more effective, and faster. A more real-life example of why it’s a good idea to experience a risk-taking, lane-shifting driver passing you five times only to end up sitting next to you at the stop light—or worse. The reason I was angry was because I had not yet listened to the advice I give high-performance and driven individuals every day of my life — “SLOW DOWN! Step off the hamster wheel of life, wait for the wheel to stop spinning, and only then, begin your journey to whatever you want.” What I realized in my recovery from THR was my pre-surgery hamster wheel was still spinning on pure adrenaline, even though my medications and mobility

Total Control: Pre-Planned Responses Imagine if you could always know what to say in any situation.  Having the right thing to say is possible. The trick is to think about all the possible ways a conversation may go and create a Pre-Planned Response. The secret is to work it from every angle until you have covered everything possible. Leave no stone unturned. So, what happens when the conversation arrives? 1) You will be calm and collected. 2) You will not be surprised. 3) You will have the right thing to say. What happens if you are surprised?  It's impossible to predict what everyone will say. But you can focus on the unexpected because you have everything else covered. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mapping Your Success Have you ever heard people preach, "Get out of your comfort zone, try new things, always stretch!"  While true, it's only part of the story. Look at anybody who has achieved goals and maintained success over a period, and you'll find: 1) Motivation. Successful people do whatever they can to stay motivated. It's not an occasional thing. It's an always thing. 2) Accountability. Successful people accept responsibility and ask others to hold them to their plan. 3) Planning. Successful people understand that no plan survives the first battle. They plan, work, and adjust until they get what they want.  4) Systemization. Successful people believe success is sequential and built level-by-level. Once achieved, it is systemized and maintained.  5) Sustainability. Successful people know that everything has an expiration date. Continuous monitoring and adjustments allow for long-term success.  I call this system MAPSS. It's all you need to get anything you want in life. Learn more about your ad choic

Productivity Efficiency I think it’s time we stop seeking more productivity. It’s too much work! I prefer being more efficient and effective.  Here are a couple of ideas that will help: 1) Say “No” to meetings if possible. If you must, keep them short and sweet. 2) Delay paying attention to incoming communication. It’s nothing more than somebody else’s to-do list. Do your stuff first. 3) Daily interruptions will never go away. You may as well expect and plan for them. 4) Only schedule up to 50% of your day. This will give you more time for unexpected events. 5) No more multi-tasking. Finish one task before the next.  The fastest way to be more productive is to make your ‘Did I Do It’ list as short as possible. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How To KNOW You Are a Success Have you ever had a crazy day that involved putting out fires and wondering when it would be time to go home? And did I mention you were doing what you love and want to be doing successfully? Why is it that life gets crazier when things go well? There’s a simple answer. No matter what you do, your life will change when enough people begin paying attention to you. Some folks will love you. Some will hate you.  Others won’t have an opinion but will say something anyway.  Many will be jealous. Lots will be proud.  It doesn’t matter what you do. You will know when you have succeeded when lovers and haters come out to play simultaneously. Focus on the lovers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Stop Driving Yourself Crazy  Whatever you desire in your life, everything starts as a thought. It will demand your attention. You have three options: 1) Deny it and keep moving. 2) Do it - put it into action. 3) Delay it and drive yourself crazy. Deny it. Do with it. Delay it. The quality of your life will be a result of your choice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You Don’t Need Plan B Have you ever wondered how the most successful people in the world get that way? Could it be their timing is right?   Do they “know” somebody?  Luck? That’s it. They get lucky! Maybe, but I think there is more to it. Every person I’ve ever known who achieved remarkable success did three things: 1) They recognized what they wanted and envisioned themselves living that life. 2) At some point, they commit and go all in. Their dream IS going to happen. There is no “Plan B.”  3) They practice never-ending flexibility and perseverance regardless of what gets in the way.  They keep going until they get what they want. Yes, it seems that you must pay a price for living the life of your dreams - and it's not money. It's YOU! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There is Always a Way When life gets in the way, do you get frustrated about being blocked?   I used to be that way. Something changed. I learned long ago that getting blocked would be an everyday occurrence. And, the bigger my goals, the more blocks would arrive. I could live with endless frustrations - or find a better way. It came down to this: 1) Blocks have nothing to do with who I am. They could be self-inflicted or caused by others, but they still have nothing to do with me.  2) If you want something, there is always a way to get it. Always… always… always. You may not like the path, your ego may get in the way, or it may scare you, but there is always a way. The next time frustration gets in your way, blow it off and keep moving. There is always a way to get what you want. Find it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Living Your Default Mode Would you like to make life easier for yourself and everybody around you? It’s time to establish a “Personal Default Mode.” Success in all areas of life smooths out when you know what to expect of yourself. It gets better when others know what to expect of you. A “Personal Default Mode” is a consistent way of acting in different areas of your life. For example: 1) How do you respond to stress? 2) What happens when you don’t get what you want? 3) Is there a behavior you expect from others? Do they know it? Most things run on autopilot when you understand how you handle day-to-day situations.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Never Triggered Again Have you ever caught yourself doing or saying something you swore you would never do?   You are TRIGGERED! It can be frustrating when you set and don't follow the rules. Sometimes, you put your foot in your mouth. Sometimes, you put the pizza in your mouth. In any case, your emotional habits usually trigger your actions before you can do anything about them. Controlling behaviors that have been on auto-pilot for years takes: 1) Catch yourself after the fact. Notice your mistake and find it sooner next time. 2) Catch yourself being triggered. You’re getting better. 3) Catch yourself before you act and stop it. GOAL! Don’t let Emotional Triggers throw you off track from your goals. Pay attention to your behaviors and make minor adjustments until you get what you want. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are You The Monkey in The Middle? Have you ever found yourself stuck in the middle? I was speaking with a client trying to be everything to everybody. His business was not growing. His life was not happy. He couldn’t seem to find a way to make progress.   That’s when I said… “My friend, you are stuck in the middle. Nothing good happens when you are in the middle.” In business and life, having low expectations and being surrounded by like-minded folks is okay.  It’s also okay to reach for your dreams, has high expectations, and expect that of others. What happens if you’re in the middle? When low and high expectations combine, confusion is the result. Mediocrity overtakes quality. Frustration will be your daily friend. The choice is yours. If I were you, I would make the decision never to get stuck in the middle. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

5 Words To Succeed at Anything When I was a baby DJ in broadcast school, I spent a lot of time learning the rules of journalism. While that subject fills books, almost everything we needed to know was - Who? What? When? Where? Why? If you know that information, you can tell a complete story. Years later, I re-arranged the formula for personal growth. Every time I set goals and consider a different direction, I ask - What? Why? When? Where? Who?  Occasionally I need to ask HOW I will accomplish my goal - but that usually takes care of itself. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let Your Greatness Shine  Whether in business, having a job, going to school, or living your life, your ability to present well will supercharge your success. Here are five tips I use every day: 1) Understand that most folk only expect you to wow them. They are not expecting bad. You shouldn't either. 2) Join the conversation THEY already have inside their head, not the one YOU are having. 3) You'll move faster if you drop the small talk and dig into the meat of your communication. You can fill in additional information later. 4) The sooner you get people to suspend disbelief and engage with you, the sooner you will succeed. 5) Stop overkill. Find the first best place to take your exit and bring your meeting to an end. You're going to be amazed at how well this works. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Focusing on YOUR Important As a child, I remember heading out the door for a day in an endless adventure. It usually concluded with a game of Hide-And-Seek.   Those days seemed to last forever. These days, most of us are still running until the sun goes down. But there's so much to do that we rarely have time to ponder the bigger picture. Remember- You will always find time for your most important tasks. You will eat, sleep, pay bills, feed the dog, and take care of your children - no matter how crazy life gets. When life gets crazy, and you scream, "Something has to GIVE…" it's usually your dreams for the future that get put off. Steven Covey reminded us how important it is to focus on what's important as much as possible. Make sure you put yourself on the list too. Then, when life goes off the rails, fix it as soon as possible, get back to what's essential, and keep moving. Not all dreams come true, but the important ones always seem to come your way. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adc

The Will and Way of Change in 30 Days Only a silly person thinks you can change everything about your life in 30 days - right? Call me silly, but everything I've ever done was rooted in a 30-day sprint - even if I didn’t know it. Here's how you do it: 1) Set what Napoleon Hill calls a Major Definite Purpose or a Big Ass Goal. 2) Stop negative self-talk. Others may throw sticks and stones; don't throw them at yourself. 3) List all the reasons you CAN be successful. Make it a long list. 4) Decide that you will do whatever it takes to reach your goal. For the next 30 days, nothing will stop you. The impossible becomes possible when you are focused, willing to take massive imperfect action, and won't take no for an answer. By the way… When you seek or follow your purpose in life, your life will become one big non-stop happiness sprint. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Interpreting Your Calling Is the Universe whispering and nudging you to move in a specific direction?  Before I go on, I must admit that I am certainly not an expert in the Universe or if it works in our life. The magic of gravity is enough to blow my mind, and the only Secret I know is that you are the only one in charge of getting what you want in your life. But what if you know that Universe is speaking to you? Calling you, compelling you to get off the sofa and do what you say you want to do? But you still won’t do it? Many years ago, I was in the habit of listening to those voices whispering inside my head and following whatever I thought they said for me to do. Eventually, after many false starts, I realized the messages were not black or white. There didn’t seem to be any particular order, and they were almost always out of context with my life. In other words, mindlessly following my feelings often ended with me not getting what I wanted, and whatever I wanted to get away from became more assertive in

10 Daily Rules for a Happier You Every day, we all jump into the craziness of life without much thought of the basic rules we use to run our day.  Here are a few of mine. You can borrow them if you would like: 1) Do what makes your heart sing. You'll always feel better when you are dancing down your path. 2) Believe anything is possible. As soon as you believe - everything IS possible. 3) Be nice to others. Expect them to do the same. No further explanation is required. 4) Believe in people and encourage their dreams. When you do, they'll return the favor. 5) Do the right thing. If you mess up, say you're sorry, try again.  6) Meet people where they are in their lives and walk with them to where you both want to go. 7) Do what you say you will do. It's always better to under-promise and over-deliver.  8) Make lemonade out of lemons. Everything is fixable if you have the right mindset. 9) Keep things simple. Yup. 10) Relax. Life is short. Double yup. Focusing on life's big picture makes it easier to enjoy your

7 Stoic Rules for Happiness I'm a fan of Stoic Philosophy. While it may be over 2,000 years old, its practicality is still valid. These rules to live by will help you have a happier life: 1. If you're going to learn and succeed, be humble. There is always someone more intelligent, more successful, and wiser.   2. Find the right scene. Choose your friends and situations. If you want to rise in life, you can't allow yourself to be held down by others. 3. Protect your time. Seneca said, "We're tight-fisted with property and money, yet think too little of wasting time, the one thing about which we should all be the toughest misers." Life is short. 4. Never do anything out of habit. Always think about how you can do things better, and always question yourself.  5. Keep it simple — do your job. Approach every task as if it were your last because it very well could be.  6. Adapt and learn from failure. Using your success to justify complacency is common. It's also easy, which is why most people do it. You can do mor

Opening New Doors Fuel Your Dreams One of my favorite questions is, “What CAN I Do?”  No matter how challenging a situation.  Answering that question always reveals a clear path. As they navigate our new world, I hear my clients ask me that question, too.  My answer usually goes something like this - “Can you do it? When you open a new door, you will find a new opportunity. Start opening more doors.” Feeling empowered in a world that is draining your energy is like Tesla on a cross-country trip without charging stations is difficult. To ensure you are never running low, remember that dreams, possibilities, potential, and a feeling of certainty are all powered by new opportunities. When you open a new door, an opportunity reveals itself. Your challenges will fade as you focus on the new way. But you must be willing to open a new door to find it. The key to thriving in uncertain times is finding opportunities behind new doors. All you have to do is open the door.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megapho