Pitney & Amelia's Bitchen Boutique

Informações:

Synopsis

A gay guy and his fat friend talking about everything! We've got over 30 years of stories to share about stuff we love, stuff that annoys us, people we've known, places we've been, and things we've seen. Geeky, silly, and always opinionated. NAMES ARE CHANGED TO PROTECT THE GUILTY!

Episodes

  • Hints From Homos!

    Hints From Homos!

    08/05/2020 Duration: 57min

    First of all, you need to know that Pitney’s mother’s house has no air conditioning, so he often records with the window open. Hence the occasionally really loud wind chimes. Reality is, like, so real. This week we are all about sharing our genius with you! Get ready to learn the proper way to use a plunger, the best way to clear a drain, the most creative ways to decorate your home on the cheap, and the number one thing you should be buying by the pound if you like being clean. And this week in woo, you’ve heard about people who talk to the dead, right? What about a woman who interviews famous dead people? Pitney is gonna turn you on to a YouTube channel you’re going to LOVE. Oh, and hey, it’s worth mentioning that this episode would normally be when we talk about all the fun we had at Texas Frightmare Weekend, but, like everything else this year, that event got rescheduled. So be sure to look for that episode in September! Promos: FriGay the 13th and 2 Skeptical Chaps (Want to swap show promos? Email us!)

  • The New Normal After COVID19

    The New Normal After COVID19

    23/04/2020 Duration: 01h21min

    We swear we aren’t TRYING to do a bunch of shows about the coronavirus, but we talk about our lives, so there it is. We touch a bit on quarantine life and being “essential.” We wonder how long it might take to get back to normal, and what normal even is any more. We get philosophical about interconnectedness and wonder if the earth is knocking us down and resetting herself a little bit. Meanwhile, Tricia Von Liechtenstein hates technology. Are you surprised? And we have a bit of a woo double shot this week! First we talk about the otherkin, and then we hear about a friend of Pitney’s who thinks COVID19 is the work of the illuminati! Promo: Dis Beer and Distress (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not the lame ones. Questions? Comments? Complaints? W

  • Period Pads For Pee?!

    Period Pads For Pee?!

    10/04/2020 Duration: 59min

    Ever have commercials that just irritate the bejesus of out you? Well, we do too! Hear all about them on this latest episode of the BitchenBoutique! Learn all about how ultra-fans worship fictitious characters, and how Pitney and Amelia are coping with health challenges, and the weirdness of the world in general. Blue liquid for urine?? Nothing is too taboo for us! Listen to the newest episode of the BitchenBoutique and be enlightened.   Promo:   https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/florida-men  2 Skeptical Chaps (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not the lame ones. Questions? Comments? Complaints? Write to us at PitneyAndAmelia@gmail.com! Tweet at us at @bitchenboutique! Stay up to date by liking our Facebook page! Join the conversation over at our Fac

  • Zen Poop Garden

    Zen Poop Garden

    27/03/2020 Duration: 48min

    Break from the real world for an hour this week and learn all about Amelia’s hair dyeing adventures! Pitney also reminisces about having hair and being a truly awful, yet chronic, hair dyer. Dogs are funny critters with some very strange poop habits, and we sure do know about that. Travel with Pitney to Pantheacon, the wonderful and fabulous annual Pagan convention in the SF Bay area and learn all about people who just can never be happy no matter how good a thing is. PC righteousness or just being self-important Negative Nancys? You decide! The Fabulous Steve joins us for this week’s woo to share about his awakening intuition. One disclaimer: Pitney wrongly states that the Radical Faeiries were founded in the 60s. It was actually the late 70s. (That will all make sense in time!) Promo: I Shake My Head http://www.ismhead.podbean.com (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or

  • Next to Godliness

    Next to Godliness

    13/03/2020 Duration: 57min

    (Did you download the show on day one? you might have gotten only half of it. Please download again!)   What a crazy week it’s been out there in the real world! But you’re getting a whole 'nuther kind of crazy on this episode. Pitney quit his job, Amelia was all excited about her upcoming trip to London, and Pitney suddenly has issues with the British but loves suicide cults for some reason. And then it’s about bathing. How clean is clean, especially when a filthy person claims they’ve washed? And this week in woo, the CLEDON. What the hell is it? Pitney explains. Promo: Podscure  and 2 Skeptical Chaps (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not the lame ones. Questions? Comments? Complaints? Write to us at PitneyAndAmelia@gmail.com! Tweet at us at @bitc

  • God Damn NaMAHste!

    God Damn NaMAHste!

    28/02/2020 Duration: 55min

    Welcome to episode 100 of the Bitchen Boutique! We can hardly believe it ourselves. This week, a couple of whiny twins who want us to believe they don't know which twin they are. Amelia isn't buying it. And we break down a list of reasons why some guy claims he "left the New Age." And in the Year of Woo, we talk about Amanda Chantal Bacon, the utterly woowoo founder of Moon Juice. Be sure to check out Jarrett Sleeper's awesome ACB video! Promo: 2 Girls on a Bench (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not the lame ones. Questions? Comments? Complaints? Write to us at PitneyAndAmelia@gmail.com! Tweet at us at @bitchenboutique! Stay up to date by liking our Facebook page! Join the conversation over at our Facebook group! If you want to be supportive with

  • Boundaries Are Love

    Boundaries Are Love

    14/02/2020 Duration: 58min

    Emotional abuse. How to spot it and how to deal with it. Setting boundaries to protect yourself. Amelia has had a rough time in recent months, and she's telling you how she put a stop to being used and abused. She also talks about metta, the Buddhist practice of loving kindness and compassion, and how it's kept her from being consumed with anger through all of this! And in the middle of it all, Pitney gives a Valentine's Day message of self-love. It ain't all hearts and flowers. Promo: 2 Skeptical Chaps  and Dis Beer and Distress (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not the lame ones. Questions? Comments? Complaints? Write to us at PitneyAndAmelia@gmail.com! Tweet at us at @bitchenboutique! Stay up to date by liking our Facebook page! Join the conv

  • Famous Dames in Mink

    Famous Dames in Mink

    31/01/2020 Duration: 40min

    The Fabulous Steve is BACK, and we've saved his best stories for last! Highlights: Tim Curry live in concert. Maurice Chevalier was a creep. Singin in the Rain was a masterpiece. MGM ruined people. Amelia’s mildewed theater program collection. Steve and Pitney and Jerry Herman and Lauren Bacall and Carol Channing. Shelling out big bucks for Hamilton. Peter O’Toole on the West End. Noises Off and the immediacy of live theater. Plus, in the Year of Woo, Amelia talks rocks! Promo: Things Joe Hates (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not the lame ones. Questions? Comments? Complaints? Write to us at PitneyAndAmelia@gmail.com! Tweet at us at @bitchenboutique! Stay up to date by liking our Facebook page! Join the conversation over at our Facebook group! I

  • Hello Finland!

    Hello Finland!

    17/01/2020 Duration: 56min

    We apologize for the sound mix in this episode. We’re on a new learning curve. Bear with us. This week, we’re talking Netflix’s Dracula and a story about Lestat and Louis that only Pitney could tell. Then a review of The Witcher and whether or not Henry Cavill is hot. The answer might surprise you! Pitney gets hit on by a human toilet. And Amelia has a bad case of the sniffles. Plus, a new page in Pitney’s diary, and in the Year of Woo, he gives us an oracle card reading for the new year! Promo: 2 Skeptical Chaps (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not the lame ones. Questions? Comments? Complaints? Write to us at PitneyAndAmelia@gmail.com! Tweet at us at @bitchenboutique! Stay up to date by liking our Facebook page! Join the conversation over at ou

  • Offer Her an Orange!

    Offer Her an Orange!

    03/01/2020 Duration: 01h01min

    (The sound is off. Apologies. Also, Amelia has cedar fever, so excuse her stuffy nose.) Happy New Year! This is the last episode Pitney recorded in Texas. A couple days after this, he loaded up the truck and moved back to California! Hear us talk about the experience of packing up your life and going home, what he’s excited about and what he’s leaving behind. Within all that, though, there’s some of the usual randomness: Pitney’s love of Robert DeNiro, Amelia’s pride in navigating sans GPS, crazy memories of Pitney’s dad, holiday plans, and something about an orange. It’ll all make sense. And in our first installment of the Year of Woo, the phenomenon of idiots butt-chugging sunshine. Promo: the BiCurean podcast (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not

  • Year of the Vagina Year-End Wrapup

    Year of the Vagina Year-End Wrapup

    27/12/2019 Duration: 01h27min

    The Year of the Vagina is at an end. We have compiled all 26 segments, from Yay Therapy through Dreaming of a Black Christmas, into a bonus episode as a gift to you. Please be sure to share this 90 minute bit of edutainment with your friends! Quick note: There is a SECRET CODE WORD tucked away in this episode. When you hear it, put it in an email and send it to PitneyAndAmelia@gmail.com. One lucky winner will receive a copy of Jen Gunter’s awesome book, The Vagina Bible, plus a little bit of show swag! In case you’re curious, the interstitial music in this bonus episode sticks with a bit of a YOTV theme. All the clips come from two recordings: It’s Tight Like That – Clara Smith, 1929 What’s That Smells Like Fish – Blind Boy Fuller, 1938 00:02:00 Basic anatomy 00:03:19 Scared of words 00:05:33 Regina talk, with Lisa and Sam from I Shake My Head 00:08:55 Vaginal durability, with Kim from People Are Wild 00:13:33 The Clitoris is AWESOME 00:16:48 China Bell, with Siana and Tricia from 2 Girls on a Bench 00:20:58

  • Dreaming of a Black Christmas

    Dreaming of a Black Christmas

    20/12/2019 Duration: 40min

    Happy Holidays! Celebrate a low-key Christmas with us as we talk about the Black Christmas reboot and a bunch of weird Christmas facts Pitney found on the internet. (For example, did you know that some devout Christians once made celebrating Christmas ILLEGAL? Oh, Christians. You so silly.) This episode features the first chapter of Pitney's New Life Diary, and the very last installment of the Year of the Vagina. Hope you like musical numbers! (Don't forget, on 12/27 we'll release a special Year of the Vagina wrapup, featuring every segment from throughout 2019!) Promos: 2 Skeptical Chaps  and Retro Cinema Podcast (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not the lame ones. Questions? Comments? Complaints? Write to us at PitneyAndAmelia@gmail.com! Tweet at

  • Something Something, Silent Bob

    Something Something, Silent Bob

    06/12/2019 Duration: 52min

    2019 is almost over, y'all! When we recorded this episode, Pitney was gearing up for his big move back to San Jose, CA. We talk about new segments being planned for the new year, audiodramas Pitney is excited to listen to in the car, a magic wand made with rubies, and a computer programmer who won't leave Amelia alone. Our last guest segment for the Year of the Vagina comes to us from the ladies at Everything is Awful Forever! Learn all about what Satan has to do with your naughty bits. Promo: People Are Wild (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not the lame ones. Questions? Comments? Complaints? Write to us at PitneyAndAmelia@gmail.com! Tweet at us at @bitchenboutique! Stay up to date by liking our Facebook page! Join the conversation over at our F

  • Thankful 4: The Revenge!

    Thankful 4: The Revenge!

    22/11/2019 Duration: 01h06min

    Happy Thanksgiving! Once again, we're here to talk about gratitude, and list some things we're extra grateful for this year. We're also gonna tell you about what next year's theme will be, so you don't want to miss that! And in Year of the Vagina news, pubic hair. It's awesome. Shoutouts to @DavidMillsDept and @BlaineStewart!   Promos: FriGay the 13th  and 2 Skeptical Chaps (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not the lame ones. Questions? Comments? Complaints? Write to us at PitneyAndAmelia@gmail.com! Tweet at us at @bitchenboutique! Stay up to date by liking our Facebook page! Join the conversation over at our Facebook group! If you want to be supportive without a lot of stuff cluttering your feed, follow us on Instagram! (Really, we barely post

  • Eight Minute Standing Ovation

    Eight Minute Standing Ovation

    08/11/2019 Duration: 44min

    Pitney finally saw the Child’s Play remake and boy does he have thoughts. Neither of us saw the new Joker movie, and boy do we have thoughts. The whole Batman universe? Thoughts. Movies that suck? Guess what. More thoughts. Ladies, you have more power in your vagina than you knew. Behold the power to control men’s minds and turn them into zombie slaves. Promo: 2 Girls on a Bench (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on your favorite platform so you never miss a show! And share us with your cool friends, not the lame ones. Questions? Comments? Complaints? Write to us at PitneyAndAmelia@gmail.com! Tweet at us at @bitchenboutique! Stay up to date by liking our Facebook page! Join the conversation over at our Facebook group! If you want to be supportive without a lot of stuff cluttering your feed, follow us on Instagram!  (Really, we barely

  • Pitneys Ghost Adventures!

    Pitney's Ghost Adventures!

    25/10/2019 Duration: 01h09min

    If you missed our guest spot on One Giant Leap for Geeks, you can check it out HERE! It’s Halloween again, and Pitney is getting ready to move back to California, so apart from one last Samhain ritual at his place, he’s focused on purging and packing. Amelia is gearing up for the hundreds of trick-or-treaters that will converge on her house, and this year she’s rallying her neighbors to get more involved in Halloween festivities. She’s learned what trunk-or-treat is, and she’s disgusted. Paranoid parents ruin everything fun! Pitney sees dead people. Or, he’s pretty sure he does. Amelia’s sister does too. And Pitney’s mom. Amelia just sees a sad clown painting. Do you know why witches are depicted riding broomsticks? The answer is dirtier than you realize. Get ready for a special witchy edition of The Year of the Vagina! Promos: a special #AllTheHorror promo from 2 Girls on a Bench, and 2 Skeptical Chaps (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review u

  • House of TV Terror!

    House of TV Terror!

    10/10/2019 Duration: 54min

    Welcome to our contribution to All The Horror 2019! We hope you check out episodes from the other shows participating this month. It's been a blast! Check the #AllTheHorror hashtag to find more! This week, we're talking about made-for-TV horror. First Pitney tells us about a few films of Lucio Fulci, the master of giallo horror, and how much he hates Italian children. (This can't surprise you, honestly.) And then we remember our favorite horror from American TV! And later, we dissect Stephen King's IT. Some of our revelations may surprise you! And in the middle of all this fun we talk about scary vaginas with Brooklyn's own Ann Fox, the author of The Cat That Caught The Canary and After Midnight. Click here to get a copy for your Nook!  And you should definitely follow Ann on Twitter, at @antoinettefoxny! Promo: Frigay the 13th  (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or

  • Farting Confetti

    Farting Confetti

    26/09/2019 Duration: 01h02min

    Pitney's dog Joxer had a lot of fun running around the room while we recorded this week's episode. Hope you like puppy noises! Pitney went to Candytopia with some friends and swam in a sea of marshmallows! Amelia recalls a ridiculous business where people pay money to take photos of themselves. Really. It's a thing. Pitney tells a story of random angry women yelling in public, which is one of his favorite things. Amelia gets an x-ray on her foot and encounters a super-rude nurse, which leads to a reminiscing about horrible bedside manners. This week's Year of the Vagina lesson is about another dumb thing Gwyneth Paltrow wants you to stick in your cooch. Let's all do some Kegels and throw things at her! Speaking of Kegels... https://medlineplus.gov/ency/patientinstructions/000141.htm Promos: 2 Skeptical Chaps and a special #AllTheHorror message from Mike, Mike, and Oscar! (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone

  • Bye Bye Podcoin!

    Bye Bye Podcoin!

    18/09/2019 Duration: 02min

    Ah, Podcoin, we hardly knew ye. So, this is really for the people who listen to us on Podcoin, but the rest of you might want to hear it, because it's goofy as hell. The couple hundred of you who subscribed on Podcoin were loyal and awesome and we're really sorry that app is kaput in about a week, but we're hoping you hear this before it's all over! Please come find us on, like, ANY OTHER PODCAST PLAYER, because we're on 'em all. Thanks for all the fun, and cash in those coins!!!

  • Bedbugs in the Bathhouse

    Bedbugs in the Bathhouse

    13/09/2019 Duration: 50min

    Remember when The Fabulous Steve was here? Well, we chatted with him about the days of personal ads, and how low-tech things were compared to the hookup apps of today. Pitney said he'd never used any of those apps and was pretty adamant about it. Then suddenly, his inner sex monster awakened and his phone was burning up with Grindr and Scruff! I know you want to hear why he says Grindr is the "armpit of the gay world." Hear the story of one especially trashy hookup he had to send packing, as well as some icky blind dates Amelia had back in the day. And there's a bedbug outbreak in San Antonio that originates in the seediest of places! This week's Year of the Vagina lesson is all about the "husband stitch." You're gonna get mad. Promos: a special #AllTheHorror message from the Brook Reading Podcast! (Want to swap show promos? Email us!) We love you for listening! Please take a moment to rate and review us, and earn a STICKER! (Everyone loves stickers!) And please subscribe or add us to your favorites list on

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