Smash Fiction

Notch...draw...bullshit! In a desperate effort to keep King Joffrey Baratheon from being bored on his name day, four of the greatest archers in all fiction have been summoned to compete in a great archery contest to determine the ultimate master of the archerial arts (copyright Colin Mulkerin). Can Legolas' elf eyes see the target (perhaps the color of that tower over there is a sign of blood and victory)? Can Hawkeye overcome the ridiculous comic book continuity that made him deaf, and then not deaf, and then deaf again? Can Merida survive our atrocious attempts at Scottish accents? Can Robin Hood somehow explain how the hell that one crazy shot in the Disney movie actually worked (and also how foxes can use bows without thumbs)? The competition is about to begin! Listeners, to your "play" buttons!