Practice Of Being Seen

Kim John Payne of Simplicity Parenting and writer of the international #1 bestseller of the same name joins us to talk about how “we can be at our best when our kids are at their worst.”   We talk about how kids “ping” us. They use their trusted parents, their safest place to figure out where they are emotionally. It’s important to try to understand when our kids have lost their bearings because, as Kim says, “I’ve never met a disobedient kid, but I have met a lot of disorientated ones.” Kim encourages us to be inquisitive rather than accusative: “I wonder why you’re so lost” moves us out of the “fight or flight” brain, the amygdala, into wondering and into the “let’s play” and “let’s cooperate” part of the brain.   We talk about what it’s like to watch ourselves at our best and at our worst and acknowledge how hard it can be to see ourselves so clearly. And we dive into a huge stress for for parents: feeling unseen. Eventually, feeling unseen and unappreciated builds up a toxic charge. The antidote: stop