Nerd Poker

Well, it was bound to happen. A gigantic classic monster exploded up from beneath the royal hall, and is taking chomps from our heroes. As long as everyone rolls well this should all be fine. Right? For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.

The path cleared, the crew must now crack open the doors to the royal hall, which appear to have been overgrown with magic vines for years, if not decades. It feels pretty unfun, because even though two of our heroes can speak to magic plants, there's probably some other horror waiting on the other side of these doors, because the DM is a dick. For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.

The royal hall of the lich king is buried in thorns, brambles, and branches. Luckily two of our crew are experienced at dealing with flora, Dr. Uid of course, but also newcomer (and huge fan of Dr. Drew Hugh Uid) Winifred Wintergem. As long as the plant isn't terrifying this should be no problem at all!

A brief message from us to you, the people who make our dreams come true! Look, it's a song! Patreon supporters- our Decemebr bonus eps are still on the way!

After an official, heavily rehearsed Christmas Carol, our crew just might focus enough to take down the gigantic gelantinous cube and the clutch of will-o-wisps. Will they save the mysterious wizard, or will they kinda forget he's there and let him get annihilated? Hell, maybe they will straight up forget they're in combat and do impressions the whole episode. Guess and take bets. and Happy Holidays dear listeners!  For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.  

If you've ever wanted to imagine a monk punching acidic jelly, well then today is your day! The battle with the gelatinous cube continues, and hopefully Dan will get to live out his dream of seeing one of his friends' characters get dissolved slowly in suspended animation!

Back to the action! It's time to raid the Royal Hall, which is bound to have more activity within than some of the patrol hallways. And that means the real dungeon crawl is beginning in earnest! Hopefully nobody will already get dissolved!

Nerd Poker is turning 10 years old! And Dan has something sneaky up his sleeve to surprise the rest of the cast, but you get to know before you listen. Gerry shows up, and we all sip wine and Scotch while goofing off, talking about old games, doing bits way off the rails, and generally being dumb. 

Our crew has gotten through swarms of harpies, retinues of soldiers, and spooky ancient traps. Now ahead we see the royal hall, the vile archlich king somewhere in its subterannean chambers. Time to rest and make a terrible mistake? Did someone just eat a Mexican pizza? We shall see! Happy Thanksgiving, listeners! For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.  

If progress is to be made towards the lich's keep, first this small sample of his army must be dealt with. And if you're looking for some classic decaptitations, boy do we have an episode for you!

Oh great, they finally found the undead army patrolling the castle. All that stands between our crew and progress are iron portcullises and a inconvenient levers, why'd some dumb evil elves have to mess with us?

There's a lich imprisoned up in the turret, and our crew is still deciding what to do with him exactly. Rob him though? Absolutely. What crew do you think we're talking about anyway?! For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.

Our heroes have hit a bit of an impasse, a giant iron portcullis before them. There's this totally chill, probably not trapped or haunted turret sitting right there, so why not walk up there? What's the worst that could happen? For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.  

After finding some elves unstuck in time, our heroes attempt to escape the abandoned kitchen and catch up with Bunk the halfling, somewhere in a hallway probably not infected with magic pink mold. Probably. For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.

Realizing it's in their best interest to keep a low profile, our crew sneaks through the castle-city's walls, the undead army's ranks mostly missing as they spread throughout the realm in search of other heroes. Surely, sneaking through a largely abandoned undead army wall won't include any untoward surprises! For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.  

As the crew ventures into the outer walls of Vyndarea they begin to realize how old (and weird) the denizens are. But when in doubt, set it all on fire. For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.

The massive city-castle looming large, our heroes approach from the cliffside. What Telfer-esque horrors loom inside? Probably something with too many fingers that breathes magma. Listen, and find out!  For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.

It's time to loot the harpy cave! Our intrepid crew has slunk up to a mysterious door, the sounds of soft breathing on the other side. What horrors might lie on the other side? Well we can promise you one thing: there is ZERO chance you will see this one coming.

The heroes clean up the harpy mess, we swear, and begin to explore the chambers before them, the vile castle looming large above. Hopefully Bunk doesn't get himself murdered by teleporting into a harpy pile again. For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.    

Our heroes pull out all the stops in their first battle- silver flames are summoned and magical songs are sung, while arm blades slash, axes fly, and Dr. Uid's forehead vein pulses. But the gravity of the situation is suddenly clear as a filth cloud threatens to take down everyone, even though they've just met. For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com. And for 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker.